Friday, July 11, 2008

lust.

I am having less and less time to blog hop now. So sorry if I hadn't been replying to your comments. Sometimes, I just don't know what to say, I'd stare and smile at the comment box for a very long time before finally deciding to exit the page. I wish I could just give you guys a polite smile :)

Talking to Mother is distracting nowadays. Her hair looks like Victoria Beckham's. She is the Posh Spice of Malaysia, I tell you, only older and fatter. I told her what I think about her new hair and she said that it'd look better after a nice blow which sent Niece and I rolling on the floor, laughing.






I feel bad because I think I am lusting over my boyfriend's bestfriend, George (bukan nama sebenar).

It is only natural that sometimes my boyfriend compares himself with him which influences me to compare him with George too.

George is famous for his looks. The first time I met him was about a year ago. I thought he was overrated.

But as time goes by, I notice I secretly steal glances at him. The sight of him makes my heart flutter. Sometimes, evil thoughts creep in, telling me that if George was my boyfriend, things would probably be easier for my parents because George fits me, in theory. In theory. His family, his education background, his age...

I am completely aware that this feeling I have for George is pure lust. I don't know George that well. I don't personally know his attitude, we never have a real, deep, meaningful conversation for me to explore whether his mind fits mine. The lust I have will probably go away once I know he is lacking the qualities I only find in my boyfriend. The problem is, my boyfriend sometimes feel insecure when he is around, he doesn't let us be friends. This makes my imagination run wild. Just like having a crush on a blogger, you could create him. You fall in love with his writings, thinking he is as perfect, as interesting, as beautiful as he is portraying himself with his beautiful words. But once the blogger reveals his looks, the crush dies off.

I need to find his flaws. He needs to reveal his flaws. Just one and that's it.

I know George has his flaws but I just need them to happen in my presence.

The only confirmed minus point I know of George is he is high-maintainence.






One of the bad (or good) things being in a relationship with my boyfriend is he introduces me to many of his male friends. Most of them are single and successful.

The old me who was satisfied just to see a presentable chap, now finds pleasure to judge him by the car he drives, the clothes he wears, the talk he talks.

Not good.

Setan. Ini semua lust!

3 comments:

bangkai said...

Naughty! Very naughty...

At least, you're fighting it, though. Good on you!

the ectopy said...

now i realize i only think of him if i just recently saw him. out of sight, out of mind!

thinker bell said...

mind introducing me to those single and available male friends that boyfriend introduces you to? :D

well , at least u buat perkara kebaikan by knowing them, and introducing them to me :D