Thursday, April 23, 2009


Money issue hadn't resolved yet.

According to him, it's not so much about the amount of money (because, during the conversation, I told him: Eh, I thought you don't mind about your moolah), what bug him the most are
- why me? The same thing over and over again!
- I'm so nice to other people, I don't deserve this
- he is a friend that I've known for so long, I trusted him
- what's wrong with me, even your parents are against me (I'm sure you know how sometimes when you feel the world is out to get you, you start to list all the bad things that are going on in your life)

I knew he just wanted to talk and he didn't need a lecture from me so I lent him my ears. After he calmed down, we hung up. I, then, typed a super long SMS, to remind both him and I, and I hope it would remind some of you as well.

Challenges come in many forms and one thing we can do to face them is by staying positive and patient about it.

Lets admit it, in our lifetime, we have committed many sins, intentionally or not. So, why don't we treat the unfortunate things that come in our ways as punishments or challenges from God.

1) As a punishment.
I know sometimes, we question, "Why me? I'm better than him, but why doesn't he get punished?"
Dear, how would you know he doesn't have his own sets of problems? He might be like you as well, who keeps everything inside because we refuse to let others see our weaknesses.
Be glad that God chooses to punish you now. God makes life difficult now because he wants to ease our lives afterwards. Have faith in God is fair, and those who have not yet received their punishments, theirs are waiting in Hell. If you were to have the options, wouldn't you rather be sentenced this way than be burnt?
So, don't think that being kind is not worth it. It always is.
And if you are really sincere in the things that you do, you shouldn't expect any kinds of rewards from anybody, even from God.

2) As a challenge.
I think we all know the same old, same old reasonings behind this. We have to face the challenge because God wants to know whether we would still love Him even when we are at difficult times in our lives. Be patient and by having the experience of overcoming challenges in our lives, we will become better people, the experiences will aid us in manouvering our lives in the future bla bla bla, I think I wouldn't bore you guys by elaborating more in this topic.
The core is: The better a person is, the more challenges he get. Tengok Firaun yang kejam tu, tak pernah sakit pun...

3) I also told him the stories I read in under the title Apa itu tasauf? (Part 2):
One part of the post is about a man who had a worker. When the worker decided to quit, he didn't take his last pay. The man used the money to invest in a business and the business boomed. One day, the worker came to him to claim his salary, so the man gave the money and all the profits from the business and the worker left him with nothing. The man remained redha with the situation and because of that, God helped him when he was stuck in a cave with two other men.
Redha (acceptance).

4) Sometimes, we forget that as unfortunate as we think we are, there are other people who are way more unfortunate than us. But they don't whine about it, so why should us?
Let me tell you a true story about me.

In college and university, I had failed several papers. Early on (when I first got the results), I felt stupid and I kept telling myself that I didn't deserve that because I always attended classes unlike some of my classmates who skipped classes but still passed. After a while, I began to accept it and as the day of repeat exam was approaching, a friend and I (who had to repeat the exam as well) decided to practice for the exam together.

Just by watching her, you'd know she worked hard, you could see the amount of written notes she had (unlike me, I prefer to read what's available and do nothing extra- No wonder I was not an excellent student, haha). During that session, I told her that sometimes I felt like quitting the course because I wasn't prepared with the amount of work we had to do, nobody told me what to expect before entering the programme. (Actually, there were people who told me about it but they never sat me down and told me seriously into my eyes. Perhaps, they didn't want to dampen my spirits) She, on the other hands, said she never felt like quitting because that was her interest and she was still interested in becoming a and she kept telling herself that nobody would care about our results once we enter the professional world.

So, on the day of the exam, a handful of us sat for the exams. We, much or less received our results on the same day (not the marks, but we knew whether we passed or failed) and I passed but she did not.

I quickly left the waiting area together with the few other guys who passed the exam because we wanted to give some privacy to those who didn't to talk personally to the examniers. As I was walking with another candidate, he said something like, "Poor Jennifer, she looked like she studied hard for the paper..."

I cannot imagine being in her shoes.

On a happy note, during those occasional repeat exams I had sat, I even managed to get the highest mark a repeat exam could get. (We were not allowed to get Honours on repeat exams). To soothe my heart, I told myself that if it was not a repeat exam, I would have scored and beat others. Too bad I screwed up the first one. And mind you, it's not easy to study for repeat exams because the exams are usually not isolated from the usual papers we had to take every semester. So, instead of studying for, lets say, 4 papers, we had to study 5 papers or 6 papers (depending on how many subjects you had failed previously)

5) Sometimes, we just cannot control everything in our life. No matter how organized we are, no matter how much effort we have put in the planning, sometimes we just can't make things go as we like, because the world does not only revolve around us, it depends on other external factors too, external factors that we cannot control.
Therefore, if sometimes we feel like we had done everything correctly, we had done our best, but things still fail to go accordingly, we just have to tell ourselves that: Things happen.
And 'Things happen for a reason.'

Don't dwell ourselves too much into our problems. Look forward, let the past be the teacher, and live in the present. Hold your head high but keep your feet on the ground. Aim for the stars, if the stars are out of reach, at least you'd land yourself on the moon.

And for that, my boyfriend thanked me and issues are finally let go.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

trusting friends

My boyfriend just lost a huge amount of money because his 'friend' refused to pay him back.

He rarely shares his financial situation with me but this one was accidentally blurted out when I scolded him for being mad at me for no particular reason. He then felt guilty for making me his punching bag and began to tell me his problem.

Before we met, my boyfriend had been duped for several times and he never really cared about them because he was unattached during that time. This continued until the first few months he met me and I gave him a long lecture on how he should be more responsible in managing his money and I told him to stop trusting people too easily. "If you want to be serious with me, you need to start saving money for our future."

He obliged and suddenly, this happened. This is supposed to be a secret, I cannot tell anybody, but here I am telling you. Haha.

The reasons he doesn't want people to know are
- the person who 'borrowed' the money is a 'friend'
- he wants to maintain the friendship
- they share the same friends, so my boyfriend doesn't want to badmouth him to worsen the situation

I know men don't like it when we nag, but I couldn't help being nosy about it.

Me: Did you ask for your money back?
Him: I did. He said- "Oh, duit tu dah habis guna. Buat business tak pulang modal."
Me: Macam tu je dia jawab? Tak pulang modal pun, still kena bayar balik! Habis tu, you cakap apa?
Him: I nak cakap apa lagi...Malaslah I nak gaduh pasal duit.

Before I could say anything else, my boyfriend started to regret what he did, "I tahu you told me so many times before to make it black and white before lending money to people. Tapi I serba salahlah, kalau I suruh sign paper, orang cakap, dengan kawan pun nak berkira. Bila I bagi pinjam, tengoklah, jadi macam ni."

He whined some more, I pun mendengar je lah dengan setia, "Kenapa orang selalu tipu I huh? I tak pernah pun tipu orang. Itulah I nak kahwin dengan you cepat-cepat, I nak duduk dengan you, habis kerja, balik rumah, main dengan anak-anak. Kalau habis duit pun, habis dekat you juga. Kalau orang minta pinjam duit, I nak cakap- Bini aku pegang duit aku, I have no money, sorry, I can't help."

Me: Jahatlah your friend...Dia tak malu ke bagi anak bini makan duit haram?
Him: Dia tak kahwin lagi.
Me: Dia buat apa dengan duit tu? You tanak saman dia ke? You ada bank statement as a proof.
Him: Tak apalah. Duit saja. Mana-mana boleh cari.

He was really sad about it so I told him that he is too nice sometimes, he needs me to counterbalance his kindness because if I were him, I'd surely kick his friend's ass.

"Kenapa you tak tumbuk je dia? Do you want me to tampar him? Kalau tak dapat balik duit pun, at least puas hati! And I think I know which friend you are talking about!" I pun geram juga. I don't want to sound materialistic but the money was better off spent on me!

A few days later, I came across this really gorgeous pair of River Island shoes. I told him that if he bought me that shoes, I'd love him long time. Haha. "Don't you want me to love you long time?" I pleaded. Somehow, I ended up saying, "How come you never buy expensive gifts for me?!"

Him: Tak pernah?
Me: I baca satu blog ni, husband dia belikan 4-5 designer handbags every year.
Him: I tak kaya macam tu. You nak handbag ke?
Me: I nak kereta!

The moment I mentioned the word 'kereta', he became sad and said, "I geramlah bila ingat balik. Enam puluh ribu tu I boleh guna buat downpayment kereta tau atau boleh buat duit wedding," and he went on and on about it.

I understand his frustration, but he was the one who said it's only money and 'rezeki di mana-mana'.

Sudah-sudahlah tu.

Siapa suruh pandai sangat bagi a lump sum of money. Tipulah sikit, cakap, I can only give you ten thousands ke...Ni jujur sangat, helpful sangat. Inilah padahnya...

Lessons of the day:
- Baik hati biarlah secara bijak supaya tidak diperolokkan.
- Beli kereta dahulu sebelum memberi pinjaman pada orang.
- Anything to do with more than ten thousands ringgit must involve an official signed agreement.
- Ditch your useless friend before they ditch you after they use you.

I have less friends than my boyfriend but I dare to say my friends have qualities unlike his.
One of his former friends used to tell people that my boyfriend made me pregnant and I aborted the child overseas. Idiot.

Saturday, April 18, 2009


My boyfriend is convinced the person who cut a cow's leg while it was still alive was a drug addict.

I don't like to jump into conclusions, so I asked him why was he so sure, he said, "Kalau setakat nak mencuri, tak adelah sampai potong kaki lembu tu hidup-hidup! Menangis tuan punya lembu tu tengok lembu dia dah tak ada kaki."

Before this, there was an incident of a pregnant cow being killed, habis perut dia terburai. Cruel gila.

When a friend's sister was a kid, around 5 or 6 years old, she was being playful with a kitten and put the kitten into a jar (balang kuih raya!) and closed the lid. She then forgot about it and the kitten died. After a round of scolding, she felt bad about it and cried for days.

When I was a kid, during one rainy day, a snail came crawling to the porch of my house and my dad put salt onto it and I watched it died.

Then, I started schooling and my friends taught me to capture grasshoppers and put it in a plastic bag, and the person who catch them the most would win. I can't remember if we released the poor insects back to the schoolfield...Luckily, the trend didn't last that long. (Maybe because we made the population extinct and we moved on to collect pokok jarum emas instead)

According to psychologists, one of the first signs that a kid will grow up to become a psychotic criminal is the act of cruelty to animals, intentionally.

So, what's the worst thing you've ever done to an animal?

My friend believes that kids got abducted because it's God's punishment to their parents for separating mother cats from their kittens.
"Binatang pun ada perasaan juga. Sekarang baru diorang tahu perasaan hilang anak".


Saturday, April 11, 2009

teka teki no brainer

I was eating strawberries when I was reminded of this simple riddle:

Dalam banyak-banyak buah, buah apa bijinya di luar?

Without thinking (and overlooking the very obvious hint: me eating strawberries), my boyfriend answered: Buah zakar!


"Buah dada? The nipples tu kira biji lah," he guessed again.

"Ish, bukanlah! Jawapannya buah strawberi atau buah gajus!"

I think my boyfriend is currently ovulating or something, haha.

Sorry if I annoy you guys for writing too much about my boyfriend lately. It kinda annoys me too...Hehe.

Friday, April 10, 2009

no shame.


Him: I rasa hidung I ni mancunglah, boleh masuk pussy you...Hehehe...
Me: WTF?


Him: I tak takut kalau ada orang tackle you. Hidung diorang confirm tak boleh lawan hidung I...Kalau hidung macam orang putih, tak apa juga!
Me: Sekarang memang ada mat salleh tengah tackle I pun.
Him: Oh, fuck!
Me: Haha!


Me: You pergi tahlil malam tadi pakai kain pelikat ke?
Him: Yup.
Me: Ooh, sexy...
Him: I tak pakai underwear pun semalam. Haha!
Me: Tak senonoh! Kenapa you tak pakai! You confident ke you ikat kain pelikat tu ketat? Kalau kain pelikat you tercabut macam mana?
Him: Kalau kain pelikat I tercabut, terkejutlah semua orang...Tengok barang I besar! Hahaha!
Me: WTF!


Me: Hello, good morning.
Him: Good morning. I keraslah...
Me: Why are you telling me this?
Him: Sebab dia tengah mencari sasaran...Hahaha...
Me: WTF, sasaran?!

Now, that's why I think we should be married. He is getting too comfortable revealing his private's life to me!

Wednesday, April 8, 2009


"Did I tell you about my mom who nearly kena ragut?" my boyfriend asked just now.
I gasped, "Oh, my God! When? What happened?"

"Ada orang nak ragut rantai emas dia. Kebetulan mak I ada pisau masa tu..."
"Eh, kenapa mak you bawa pisau?"

"Mak I nak pergi potong pokok pandan. Bila peragut tu nampak mak I ada pisau, dia terus lari!"


Friday, April 3, 2009

boyfriend dan *Ramli

As scheduled, my boyfriend is currently in the hospital. Instead of one minor surgery, he'll be getting two operations. The first went smoothly, next will be today at 3pm.

I feel bad because I'm not able to hold his hands or greet him with my sweetest smile as he opens his eyes or tell him not to be afraid (he's terrified with needles). But, I'm too far. His fault, he picked the wrong time. "But you told me to get better as soon as I can! And this is the quickest appointment I can get!" he said to me when I whined about it.

Me: I wish I can be there to help you pack your things.
Him: Tak apa...
Me: Don't forget your slippers, towel, toothbrush and toothpaste, shower gel, your mobile phone and the charger.
Him: Okay...
Me: Don't forget the most important thing of all!
Him: What?
Me: My photo!

Circumstances made us difficult to contact each other via phone. The nurses told him not to use mobile phones because it'd interrupt with the machine functions. I was warned about this beforehand, so the only way to be informed about his progress was via his bestfriend, *Ramli.

(I notice that I always give funny, exotic names to replace the characters' real names. Syndrome malas nak pikir nama, whatever comes to mind first, haha.)

So, I said to *Ramli, "Tell him that I'm sorry I can't be there with him to suap chicken soup but I miss him and I love him. Tell him that he'll be alright. Ah, and please kiss him on my behalf, muaah muaah dekat pipi dia, okay? Tell him to go to the canteen and call me! He is a patient, not a prisoner. If a smoker can do anything he can to smoke a cigarette, he should do whatever he can to reach me! Because he is supposed to be addicted to me!"

Two days after the first procedure, my boyfriend summoned enough energy to escape the ward and we finally got to exchange comforting words. Casually, I asked him,

Me: Did *Ramli send my messages to you?
Him: Yup, he said that you missed me.
Me: Haha, did he kiss you?
Him: He did! Did you ask him to kiss me?
Me: (OMG, I can't believe he actually did it and my boyfriend is okay with it. What kind of relationship is this, I do not permit!)
Me: He kissed you? What, is this normal between you guys? Didn't he tell you that I asked him to kiss you for me?
Him: Ish, apa you ni, kitorang mana biasa kiss-kiss ni! We were just goofing lah, tak kena pipi pun...And he told me you yang suruh dia kiss I...Sweetlah you ni...
Me: (So relieved)
Him: Pipi I untuk you seorang je lah!

Kesian my boyfriend, he is bored and lonely there. He remains low-key about his admission to the hospital, his parents don't visit him because they are too old to travel and I am away. The only person who pays him daily visit is *Ramli.

My boyfriend genuinely cares about *Ramli which makes me sometimes doubt about them. They've known each other for about 20 years and they see each other almost every single day. Even their mothers are friends!

One time, my boyfriend broke his promise to me. I was so upset and we had a huge argument. I questioned him, am I not important to you? He said: *Ramli needs my supports, I had to be there for him.

That's how special *Ramli is to my boyfriend.

They buy each other gifts, they wear the same size of clothes and worry not, they even have the same taste in fashion. "I tak payah risau kalau nak pesan barang dekat *Ramli, whatever he buys for me, I will like it sebab size and taste kitorang sama," my boyfriend used to say.

According to my boyfriend, when my boyfriend first met me and couldn't stop talking non-stop about me, *Ramli always agrees with him because *Ramli's girlfriend and I have similar backgrounds and personalities and our physiques look the same too. However, I have yet to confirm this because she is in another state and I never get to see her.

(I asked my boyfriend who is hotter, me or *Ramli's girlfriend and he couldn't decide. He is either
a- terlalu lurus bendul; I should be hotter because I am your girlfriend, idiot!
b- thinks if he says *Ramli's girlfriend is less hot, that means stabbing him for badmouthing his girlfriend
c- *Ramli's girfriend IS hotter than me because my boyfriend does not usually hesitate to compliment my looks)

Mereka berdua sangat comel dan kadang-kadang mencurigakan. Haha.

Updated: *Ramli parents and my boyfriend's parents went to see my boyfriend at the hospital. If my boyfriend and *Ramli were married, they would've 4 kids, the oldest being 17 years old.