tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-47108200855897111292024-03-14T05:53:07.183+08:00this and thatthe ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.comBlogger798125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-74624913432862360112024-02-01T21:28:00.001+08:002024-02-01T21:28:08.243+08:00I had the scare of my life yesterday. I was working, talking on the phone, and a client in front of me, when suddenly, I felt like someone is tugging on the phone that I was holding. I ignored it for the first two tugs before I got annoyed, like, can't you see I'm busy talking on the phone, how rude!<div><br /></div><div>I turned myself, saw nobody behind me, but the phone kept tugging, and saw my own hand! My own hand which I did not control, nor could I feel it! It freaked me out but I had to stay calm. There was a client in front of me. I switched hand quickly, and saw my left hand on my lap. On my lap, but it didn't feel like mine. After I finished talking on the phone, I put my right hand on my left hand, but still, I could not feel anything.</div><div><br /></div><div>The closest thing I could describe it is like I dissociated from my body. Paham tak! Like, that's my hand, but I couldn't move it, I could not feel it!</div><div><br /></div><div>It lasted for a few minutes. After my client left, I could feel and move my left hand again. I got myself checked and burst into tears because it was so scary! Am I having. A stroke? Am I dying? My BP shot up, my heart raced. But it became normal again after I calmed myself down. Bloods came back normal.</div><div><br /></div><div>I also did a CT scan, and hopefully that is normal too.</div><div><br /></div><div>My colleagues and friends hope everything would be normal. They think it's some nerve thing going on, which is temporary.</div><div><br /></div><div>I'm not trying to be a pessimist, but I know what I went through. And that was totally not normal, that was something not right. It didn't feel like it's some nerve thing. What next if the scan and the bloods are normal?</div><div><br /></div><div>I question myself. Did I hallucinate? Is this schizophrenia? Was I possessed? Is this how paralysis feel like?</div><div><br /></div><div>I pray that if there's something wrong with me, I'd catch it early to treat it.</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-67017345363710673612024-01-19T04:57:00.003+08:002024-01-19T04:57:59.315+08:00Woke up just now at 3.49am in tears.<div><br /></div><div>Yesterday, Abang K did his puasa sunat. We woke up for sahur. I made burger for him. Half asleep, Abang K said, "Thank you, Mommy, for cooking." Aww...The sweetest. Before he went back to bed, he hugged and kissed me.</div><div><br /></div><div>It's Friday today, the holiest day in Islam. Before bedtime, I remember scolding my kids for staying up late, watching the tablets for too long, coming back home too late...I had so many chores to do. Then, we slept.</div><div><br /></div><div>I prayed one hour earlier, including Tahajjud. I fell back to sleep but only an hour. I had the weirdest dream:</div><div><br /></div><div>My son is in a boarding school. I'm visiting him with my daughter. It's a fancy school, my son shares a room with a girl and they have TVs in their room. I guess, it's co-ed because they are only 10, soon 11.</div><div><br /></div><div>My son is alone and happy to see me. We talk until I see the injury on his left arm. They are scabs and some skin falls off. Typical of son, he's so nonchalant about it. What happened, I ask? Teacher rotan.</div><div><br /></div><div>There's a rush all over my body. "Jom, ikut Mommy balik. Nak tukar sekolah? Tak payah duduk asrama lagi," I play it cool. My son is happy to hear this. "Jom, kemas barang," I say.</div><div><br /></div><div>I enter his fancy room. I quickly put whatever I can get in plastic bags, holding in my tears. When my son isn't looking, I cry. Guilty, I wonder- How long has this been going on? Why my son has never told me anything before? Why did I put him in a boarding school! Who is the unreasonable adult teacher? I should've protected my own son!</div><div><br /></div><div>My son sees me crying softly, and he doesn't know why. He probably thinks he deserves the punishment. "Siapa buat? Kenapa teacher rotan? Sakit tak?" Teacher Farah. Then he shows me the marks that are on his body too. My face is hot seeing it.</div><div><br /></div><div>As we are packing, a group of students return from their classes. They are shouting to Abang K to get ready for their evening routine, probably riadah then Maghrib prayer. I see male teachers among them. "Ustadz!" I yell as loud as I can. There's rage in me.</div><div><br /></div><div>"Siapa buat anak saya? Saya bukan bayar murah. Kenapa buat anak saya!" Two ustadz and a female teacher look at each other. They are trying to stall. Their faces are sorry but they are holding back. Behind them, out came a short, chubby female teacher. "Ya, Puan, saya cikgu Abang K. Puan kena banyak bersabar," she says, collected and confident. The other female teacher signals to me that it is her.</div><div><br /></div><div>I just can't..."Kenapa buat anak saya! Saya nak report polis. Saya nak saman!" I am going to get justice. She's going to jail. I am going to make sure she pays for this.</div><div><br /></div><div>"Report lah. Samanlah," she provokes me. Now, people are holding our bodies so we couldn't get physical. I whip out my phone and start recording. Apparently, she had a history of stalking her ex before this. My case against her strong and I am going to win.</div><div><br /></div><div>This psycho does care and begins to pose for pictures. I hate her so much, "Tak payah nak senyum-senyum nak cover muka buruk asal kau. Kau tu, muka buruk, hati buruk, otak pun ugly!". There's no sabar left in me, and I kick her with my left leg.</div><div><br /></div><div>At 3.49 am, I really kicked in my sleep. I woke up and traumatized because it felt so real. I cried and cried. Kesian sangat my anak kena buli dengan cikgu. Padahal, Abang K tu baik sangat! Nakal, ye, tapi rotan sampai macam tu!</div><div><br /></div><div>What does this dream mean? It's bothering me.</div><div><br /></div><div>My son is fine. Teacher Farah is his English teacher and English is my son's favourite subject. The teacher in the dream looked like a mix of current Fathiya Latiff and my boss.</div><div><br /></div><div>What does it mean?</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-20321226579494837542023-12-06T23:14:00.003+08:002023-12-06T23:15:17.600+08:00Sometimes, I miss my old hectic life. I miss the fact that I was so busy that I didn't even have time for trivial stuff. I can only concentrate on what's important to me, and that means getting my priorities straight. I miss when I only had FB, very rarely used used IG. I miss it when a lot of people were strangers to me. I didn't know any influencers or famous people. I didn't know what was trending. I was way too cool...<div><br /></div><div>But, I don't miss that I was becoming more and more distant spiritually. I prayed, and Allah answered my prayers, Alhamdulillah. But, now I am becoming more aware of what's going on in this world. It's evil, corrupted and ugly, it's making me sad.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>Anyway, I had a conversation with my friends. Basically, my friend Lila found out that her cousin who she grew up with had cancer, and she didn't have the heart to tell her. My other friend, Farid, agreed, and he said it's best to let the surgeon break the bad news to her cousin instead.</div><div><br /></div><div>So, I guess, there are two types of people:</div><div><br /></div><div>1) Type me.</div><div><br /></div><div>I would rather receive the news early. I would rather my close friends/ family tell me first before someone else. I would be devastated and feel betrayed, if I found out that you knew, but didn't tell me, even if you think it's for my own sake. I don't expect you to tell me in details, but only the truths. Because I prefer you to be direct to me.</div><div><br /></div><div>If I had cancer? Tell me. If you see my husband is with some other woman? Tell me. If I woke up from a coma and my house burnt down and I lost a leg? Tell me. Tell me, but not eventually. Tell me before I found out from someone else who I don't even know.</div><div><br /></div><div>Just tell me, and hold my hands. I don't need your solution. Maybe, I don't even need your opinion. I just need your presence so I can feel comfortable to cry and let my guard down. Then, maybe, prepare myself when I receive the news from the doctor himself.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>Of course, the decision to disclose a news depends on the receiver. I mean, if you are close to someone, you would know how that someone can handle bad news. Maybe that someone belongs to type two.</div><div><br /></div><div>2) The type which is opposite of me.</div><div><br /></div><div>What do you think? What type are you? Or, what would you do? Would you tell or let someone else break the bad news to your friends/ family?</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-29136639314546216572023-09-26T03:47:00.002+08:002023-09-26T03:47:33.042+08:00Me, doing my weekly chores, pressing my husband's work clothes, when my husband came into the room after being out for the whole day, which annoyed me..."You ni, satu hari keluar!"<div><br /></div><div>I did not shout, but, yes, I raised my voice. Son hurriedly went into the room to check on me, "Kenapa Mommy? Mommy marah ke? Kenapa?" Bless his little soul ❤️</div><div><br /></div><div>"Daddy tu!" I told him as I rolled my eyes.</div><div>Then, my son went close to me, "Oohh...Mommy sabar, okay? Kena sabar...Don't worry, Mommy, because I'm gonna love you and I will give you happiness!" My son wanted a hug, but I told him to be careful as I was still holding the hot iron.</div><div><br /></div><div>He said that. And I'm going to remember that moment.</div><div>Manalah dia belajar...Thank you, Allah for this beautiful creature. Memang Mommy pun akan sentiasa doa yang baik-baik sahaja untuk Abang K dan Baby H.</div><div><br /></div><div>-----</div><div><br /></div><div>My kids finished school early while husband was outstation, so I decided to bring them to my workplace to pass the time until 5pm. Found out my son had homework, but he didn't bring it home because "The due date is 5 days away..."</div><div><br /></div><div>I'm always serious when it comes to schoolwork. Before I exploded, my son quickly dropped the thing he was doing (playing the computer) and gave his full attention to me (or...to make sure he didn't screw things up further).</div><div><br /></div><div>One of my staff witnessed this.</div><div>Today, my staff asked me, "Miss Ectopy, macam mana nak buat anak jadi taat macam Abang K?"</div><div>Wow, big word. Taat. Entah-entah fear kot, sebab Mak garang sangat. Hahaha...</div><div><br /></div><div>Alhamdulillah untuk anak yang taat.</div><div>I don't have the answer yet to that question.</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-39035005885677892242023-09-09T04:49:00.001+08:002023-09-09T04:49:06.204+08:00If I were to live until 80, I am now actually very close to the midpoint of my life, guys! But, what if I die when I am 50...<div><br /></div><div>Anyway, what I'm trying to say is, it has taken me so long to come to terms with my life and myself. The major one is something that I just realized recently, I am now okay with how my face is. Gasp! I used to wish I was prettier, maybe I wished for a nicer nose, my pictures didn't look too good, I wished my skin looked as it was with the filters on...</div><div><br /></div><div>Guess I want to applaud this new generation of Tik Tok users who are not afraid to show themselves on camera. They don't care! And they definitely slay...I mean, now, I appreciate beauty in non-conventional faces. It's funny how we avoided cameras before, but these young boys and girls...They are raw, they show whatever they like, they say whatever they want to say...Thanks to you guys, I am not as bad as I thought I was! Finally, I feel pretty too...Can't believe it took me this long to say: I am pretty, instead of I am average looking. I didn't even realize I had this physical inferiority complex in me...Until I used the inverted filter on Tik Tok and didn't despise at myself.</div><div><br /></div><div>If you are 20 or 30 and you feel like you still haven't settled down, or you haven't figured things out...It's okay, totally! Because, I baru je reach contentment in my life and look how old I am...I am okay with myself. In fact, I am grateful. Not perfect, but am content. At this age, I realize contentment is better than perfection, just as peacefulness is better than happiness...</div><div><br /></div><div>Since my last post about Edward Norton, I have been watching his movies. He is my man of the season currently. Hahaha...</div><div>As I rewatched Fighter Club, I found out that I prefer Ed than Brid (Pitt) now. Young Miss Ectopy would drool over Brad Pitt, but not current Ectopy. Ed is cool, not very good looking but he is smart. No major controversies, carefully curates which characters he wants to play, appears smart, responsible and well-spoken. I don't even mind that he's old now! Hahaha!</div><div><br /></div><div>Just like being okay with being alone now...Solo meals, solo shopping, solo movie, solo travelling...When 20 years back, I was always surrounded by friends. Always had to have something planned for the weekends. Now, I don't mind staying home...The ultimate contentment! When you truly believe Allah is always there for you...</div><div><br /></div><div>It's funny when you thought you know yourself, but, even at this age, you continually evolve and progress, and you keep learning new things about yourself. It's amazing because it makes us human, because we grow out of or into something. We are not stagnant creatures...</div><div><br /></div><div>---</div><div><br /></div><div>Sometimes, it frustrates me, for example</div><div>Situation: When I crave for good food</div><div>Solution: I order expecting something to satisfy my crave, after carefully selecting the menu</div><div>How I order food: I need to justify the price (everything is so expensive nowadays) VS the ingredients (because I want something healthy and match the price, not paying RM40 for salad!) VS the portion (I don't want a big portion because I want to eat other kinds of food too without overeating)</div><div><br /></div><div>And after all that...The taste is meh...I am not satisfied but I can't order something else because I can't waste my food...It's annoying.</div><div><br /></div><div>I wish restaurants would sell mini-sized food that's not very expensive. Let me devour your food without guilt...So I can order a starter, a main and a dessert, instead of choosing just one.</div><div><br /></div><div>Like, donut. You sell all this yummy-looking donuts, and how do I choose only one flavour for myself! It's ridiculous. Buy normal-sized donuts in 6 different flavours instead? You are killing me...</div><div><br /></div><div>It's either killing myself with diabetes or get more friends that can share food with me...The first option is easier and faster.</div><div><br /></div><div>What a rant...At almost 5 in the morning...😅</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-49604469971328262542023-08-20T12:27:00.004+08:002023-08-20T12:27:45.415+08:00Just watched The Painted Veil and it's probably one of my favourite movies.<div><br /></div><div>I usually don't like love stories about infidelity but I give this one an exception. I wish the romance parts were longer, I really want to see how the husband falls back in love with his wife.</div><div><br /></div><div>Ending dia sedih lah, penat nangis.</div><div><br /></div><div>I love Walter. He is kind and intelligent. Haishhh...Tak hensem pun tak apa.</div><div><br /></div><div>If I had to advice anyone about love, I would always say to choose the kind one. I simply don't understand why anyone would put other qualities on top of it. I remember whenever my friends asked for my advice, I would tell them- He's so kind!, but they always argued back- "But, he's younger than me," or "But, he only drives a Wira," or "But, he's ugly!"</div><div><br /></div><div>Kindness and intelligence. I just can't stand a man who can't use his brain. Suck ick.</div><div><br /></div><div>But, I guess, we have different preferences. That's life. What's your number one quality you look for in a partner?</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-91508693306342021602023-08-01T23:10:00.001+08:002023-08-01T23:10:09.152+08:00Primary 4: Mommy, Ustadz cakap, boys will mimpi flying flying, lepas tu, ada white stuff dekat kaki. White stuff tu apa?<div><br /></div><div>Me: ??? Apa dia?</div><div><br /></div><div>Primary 4: (Repeats)</div><div><br /></div><div>Me: Are you talking about puberty?</div><div><br /></div><div>Primary 4: No! Ustadz kata, kalau ada white stuff tu, kena pergi mandi!</div><div><br /></div><div>Me: Yeap! That's semen.</div><div><br /></div><div>Primary 4: Apa tu?</div><div><br /></div><div>Me: Ada white stuff coming out from your bebird. It happens when you have sexy dreams. It's a sign of puberty. When you are a teenager.</div><div><br /></div><div>Primary 4: What! Euw! Girl pun ada ke? Mommy ada ke macam tu?</div><div><br /></div><div>Me: Mommy tak ada bebird. Girls reach puberty when they get their periods. I have period.</div><div><br /></div><div>Primary 4: Betulke Mommy?</div><div><br /></div><div>Me: Betullah! Your Ustadz did a bad job of explaining it to you! Now, you understand?</div><div><br /></div><div>Primary 4: Ustadz kata mimpi flying flying...</div><div><br /></div><div>Hahaha...WTF is mimpi flying flying. My kid was totally imagining himself flying in the sky or in the aeroplane!</div><div><br /></div><div>---</div><div><br /></div><div>Anyway, Muse best gila nak mampus woiiii!!!</div><div><br /></div><div>Best ways to lose weight</div><div>1) Go to a concert where the food is overpriced- auto calories restriction.</div><div>2) Go to a concert that plays your favourite songs, fast paced.</div><div>3) Dance and jump without feeling tired coz you are having fun.</div><div><br /></div><div>Within hours, you're gonna get a sore body. Hahaha...Worth it!</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-55952658615357424342023-07-29T06:42:00.000+08:002023-07-29T06:42:01.284+08:00Kids been away from me for multiple days for multiple of times. Since young. Either due to the nature of my work, or, when they balik kampung.<div><br /></div><div>Never a problem.</div><div><br /></div><div>Sent my son for him first 'camp'; a schooltrip where he had to spend one night in a dorm. He came back well. He didn't love it, but it was okay, he said, because they got to do some jungle trekking and swimming in the river.</div><div><br /></div><div>I lied to them that I need to go somewhere for work. I'm watching Muse tonight, but won't be bringing them because I need to catch an early morning flight back for a meeting. It's been a while since I last leave my kids for 'work', so my son is suddenly not used to the idea.</div><div><br /></div><div>Yesterday, he kept hugging me and saying that he would miss me. Before bed last night, I told him- what he feels is what I felt when he went for his schooltrip. Not really, I was really fine, but I needed to validate his feelings, you see...</div><div>Then, he admitted- I cried before I slept (at the camp) because you were not there!</div><div><br /></div><div>This was new information!</div><div><br /></div><div>Me: But you told me you tidur mati that time.</div><div>Him: I cried first, then I tidur mati! I only had 6 hours of sleep...(They woke up early the next day for Qiyamulail)</div><div>Me: Awww...Why you didn't tell me...</div><div>Him: Tak apalah...</div><div><br /></div><div>Drama betul lah anak I ni. Seriously, kalau I tinggalkan balik kampung duduk dengan his gandma and cousins for 1 week, okay je pulak...Main 24/7, siap sedih lagi when it's time to go home.</div><div><br /></div><div>How would he feel when he finds out that actually, I'm going to a concert...Hehehe...</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-89967575982222069732023-06-20T14:54:00.000+08:002023-06-20T14:54:03.177+08:001. Managed to secure the Coldplay concert tickets, but annoyed at how many days they are performing in Singapore. From 4 days, to 5 days to 6 days...WTH! Betul ke fans diorang ramai ni, yg sanggup spend that much of money, or we, Asians just love to over glorify them white, we are obviously still mentally colonized! Guys! Ugh, I'm disgusted at myself...Such ick now...<div><br /></div><div>They better give 100% at each show. I'm not so very excited now...The hotel rates gonna shoot up...</div><div><br /></div><div>Well, I hope the foreign people going to Singapore would come and boost the Malaysian economy as well. Tolonglah jejak kaki to Malaysia, explore the other side...</div><div><br /></div><div>2. You know how I have a different crush every few months? Hehe...Been obsessing with this guy for like, a month, now. Handsome lah budak niii...Can't say his name because he's too young, hahaha...Sedar diri I dah tua...</div><div><br /></div><div>Anyway, I hope he shows a side of him that would turn me off, soon. Because, seriously, penat tau jadi peminat ni...</div><div><br /></div><div>3. My son ni kan, kadang-kadang betul-betul mencabar kesabaran I. But I know, he has a soft spot for me. Apa-apa pun, mesti Mommy. Unlike my daughter, who claims she has multiple boyfriends- this, she gets from me, hahaha...My son, on the other hand, hates girls...He even says he doesn't want to get married ever, he just wants to take care of me.</div><div><br /></div><div>For our anniversary, my husband gave me a bouquet of flowers. Imagine my shock when suddenly, my son said he wanted to give those flowers to his girlfriend. Who is your girlfriend? I immediately asked. "You. You are my girlfriend." Awww...Nasib baik. I ingatkan dia dah berubah fikiran.</div><div><br /></div><div>Tapi tu lah. Sebab my son ni Mommy's boy sangat, I kena berjaga-jaga what's coming out from my mouth when I get angry. Kalau silap cakap, I know I will hurt him deeply, because he really listens and looks up to me. Tapi tu lah kan, bila dah marah, usually pasal his schoolwork, eee...geram sangat. I ni memang nerd lah, kalau pasal schoolwork, I memang cepat betul triggered.</div><div><br /></div><div>I kena paham, anak I ni late bloomer sikit.</div><div><br /></div><div>I doakan anak-anak I berjaya dunia akhirat, because they truly deserve the success. Anak-anak yang sangat baik dan memuliakan I sebagai ibu.</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-4558030153755857642023-06-15T22:33:00.002+08:002023-06-15T22:37:01.995+08:00<div data-en-clipboard="true" data-pm-slice="1 1 []">I bukan lah nak perasan ke apa, but I am happy with the progress that I've made so far. I feel like Allah really listens to my pleas and has guided me, I feel so blessed. I finally feel like He really loves me and wants me to be in heaven with Him.</div><div><br /></div><div>Before this, I had always feel like I didn't deserve anything from Him. I was aware that my life was not bad at all, but I thought He was just ignoring me. Last Ramadhan, I realized He had tested me with the hardest challenge of all! How stupid was I...</div><div><br /></div><div>I pray that this momentum continues. Iman goes up and down, and I hope I will never stray too far from Him ever again.</div><div><br /></div><div>Just a reminder to all of us. No matter how insignificant and sinful we think we are, just keep on doa. Doa, doa, doa because Allah loves those who make doa to Him. Doa as much as you can, doa for anything even though it is so silly, just doa. Remember, Allah tu Maha Baik, He will forgive all of our sins, InsyaAllah.</div><div><br /></div><div>And, if your doa is not granted here, it will be granted in paradise. Allah is so perfect, He never breaks His promises.</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-68032609928839744422023-05-17T22:39:00.002+08:002023-05-17T22:39:47.416+08:00Lost the Coldplay battle and quite annoyed because I think those who somehow able to purchase are not actual fans. Haha. Like, you tak tau pun lagu diorang, you tak beli pun album diorang, you tak tahu pun history diorang...<div><br /></div><div>Got my hope high because</div><div>- Ramai orang comment tak cukup duit sebab baru raya</div><div>- Coldplay ni Millennials punya zaman</div><div>- Tickets are quite pricey. Kids can't afford them, right?</div><div>- Wednesday night concert. Budak-budak pergi sekolah</div><div><br /></div><div>Tapi...<br /><div><br /></div><div>Sad lah jugak...But not too sad because I didn't actually use a lot of laptops/ PCs, as I was working yesterday and today...So, tak focus sangat. I attended meetings in between, entertaining clients etc, as usual. Siap pergi beraya...</div><div><br /></div><div>And maybe, bukan rezeki I kot...Mana tau, tiba tiba menang contest pula lepas ni? Hahaha...</div><div><br /></div><div>It's okay, mana tau kalau tiba tiba ada second day concert. But, so hard, cause Malaysia panassss...Pengsan Mat Salleh tu nanti.</div><div><br /></div><div>Tu je lah. There must be a better plan for me. Kena pergi holiday overseas time tu, to mend this broken heart...</div></div><div><br /></div><div>Hish. I dah siap hype my kids dah pasal Mommy nak jumpa boyfriend. Sigh. My son hugged me after I told him that I didn't get the tickets. Kids are always so very supportive of me. Diorang layan je Mommy...Husband prefers Metallica, so, he really doesn't care.</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-57944779834150784062023-05-05T22:39:00.002+08:002023-05-05T22:39:50.540+08:00My daughter realized that she can now read better.<div><br /></div><div>I applauded for her achievement.</div><div><br /></div><div>Me: Awww...Baby H! Well done, you can read faster now!</div><div>Baby H: *Proudly smiles* Why am I better now?</div><div>Me: Because you practice every day! You use DuoABC and you go to school...</div><div>Baby H: Bukanlah, Mommy...It's because you doa for me. You pray every day kan...</div><div><br /></div><div>And that's a lesson from my kid. Alhamdulillah.</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-81364205355747284472023-03-16T20:56:00.003+08:002023-03-16T20:56:22.229+08:00We went to visit my aunt and was served with pegaga drink. It was green as the grass. My daughter didn't mind it but my son was like, "Ew, what's this? Tak sedap!" I told him it's a type of detox drink.<div><br /></div><div>He repeated himself, "Tak sedap, Mommy!" I gave him the eye to shut him up. Unfortunately, my cousin saw our body language and chuckled.</div><div><br /></div><div>Just now, after dinner, I approached my son in his room.</div><div><br /></div><div>Me: Abang K, can I tell you something?</div><div>Son: Apa?</div><div>Me: If you eat something, but it's tak sedap, just don't say anything. Diam je.</div><div>Son: Oh, I knew that.</div><div><br /></div><div>Me: ....You knew? Then, why did you complaint?</div><div>Son: Mana ada!</div><div>Me: Remember when you said the green drink tak sedap?</div><div>Son: Oh. But you told me not to lie! So, I told you the truth! Mommy ni! 🤨</div><div><br /></div><div>Me: Just...If you don't like it, don't say anything.</div><div><br /></div><div>Then he ran out of the room to continue playing his mobile games.</div><div><br /></div><div>P/s:</div><div>Do not serve detox drink to kids.</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-39025804168068121682023-03-07T02:59:00.000+08:002023-03-07T02:59:27.541+08:00Was excited to watch Big Fish because<div>1) I think Ewan McGregor is cute and I'm a fan since Moulin Rouge, love his blue eyes...</div><div>2) Great review and I had never watched it before</div><div><br /></div><div>Decided to Google Ewan McGregor and found out he was in a messy divorce. Like, what...Such a turn off...</div><div>Separation and falling out of love might be inevitable. Especially among the celebrities...But you don't have to make it messy...</div><div><br /></div><div>That information made such a big impact, that I don't find him desirable anymore! Hahaha...See, I don't like people just because of the way they look! I watched Big Fish and suddenly, he is not as attractive as before, and I was not as excited to see him on screen as I did.</div><div><br /></div><div>Suddenly, I didn't enjoy the movie even though I know the movie is my kind of film.</div><div>Awww...What a shame. Tua dah si Ewan ni...</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-57074372159806626242023-02-27T23:31:00.000+08:002023-02-27T23:31:06.961+08:00Today, I want to document the failure and success of me as a mom.<div><br /></div><div>I sent my son a normal kindergarten school. Bukan Islamic punya. Because I knew later in his life, he won't be having many friends outside of his race, logistically speaking. And I thought, it was good to expose him to interact with Chinese speakers. He had tuition for Iqra' 3 times a week in the afternoon.</div><div><br /></div><div>And then, we enrolled him to a private sekolah agama integrasi. Great, right. Here, he can learn to hafal and understand Al-Fatihah, learn how to solat...I remember I learned how to solat when I was about 9 years old, and I'm fine.</div><div><br /></div><div>This year, I caught him still tak hafal doa Tahiyatul Awal and Akhir. 🥴</div><div><br /></div><div>I hardly can believe this. I mean, sometimes he came home telling me that he became the imam for his class. And...Sekolah agama for 3 freaking years!</div><div><br /></div><div>This came about because I started to tell him to complete his solat at home. Previously, he only solat in school and on and off at home. He followed us solat, so I always thought he knew.</div><div>So, now that I've become a little bit stricter about solat, I am always reminding him to correct his solat. Like, stand properly, sit correctly, do your ruku' straight, say your words clearly, don't just baca dalam hati!</div><div><br /></div><div>And when I wanted to test his bacaan, then I realized he tak hafal lagi! He dah hafal sekarang, Alhamdulillah.</div><div><br /></div><div>Just now, before sleep, I advised him- Abang K, you kena solat betul betul. Jangan skip solat. After you died, the first thing Allah will ask you, is about your solat. Don't be like me. I used to skip my solat and I'm in so much debt now. I want to go to heaven and I want you to be in heaven. If you solat, you will become successful.</div><div><br /></div><div>"Aren't you successful, Mommy?"</div><div>"I'll be a lot more successful if I didn't skip solat."</div><div><br /></div><div>I continued to advise him- Remember to berdiri tegak. Jangan gerak-gerak. Kalau solat jemaah, even though Imam baca Al-Fatihah, you still have to recite your fatihah. Kena baca until you hear yourself. I'm telling you this because I didn't know when I was small. Don't make the same mistakes like I did.</div><div><br /></div><div>"Oh, I hear myself in my heart."</div><div>"No! You recite until you hear yourself in the ears!"</div><div>"Oh. Mommy, why I tak pandai solat? Sekarang baru pandai?"</div><div><br /></div><div>So, I explained- Maybe, sebab you were not in Tadika Agama. And, during MCO, you didn't go to school, belajar online je. Teachers thought you knew, and teachers thought you solat at home, but you didn't. But it's okay, now you know.</div><div><br /></div><div>"Okay, Mommy. Can you baca doa pandai for me?"</div><div><br /></div><div>So, I recited to him the first 4 ayats of Surah Ar-Rahman.</div><div><br /></div><div>I'm such a bad mom, kan?</div><div>Anak staff I, baru 4 tahun, tapi dah hafal doa Tahiyat.</div><div><br /></div><div>I balik Malaysia because I didn't know how to raise a family there. I bukan alim sangat, entah-entah lagi hanyut. I didn't even have the courage to start covering overseas. It would be awkward if suddenly one day I walk in with a tudung, right? Nak bangun ambil wudhu masa winter for Subuh prayer pun dah cukup struggle. Banyak pahala diorang. So much respect for Muslims there, pahala jihad hari-hari. It's easier in Malaysia. Tapi itu pun I didn't make sure my son know his basic. I'm a bad mom.</div><div><br /></div><div>But, it's okay. I am counting my blessings. Alhamdulillah dapat anak yang mendengar kata. Lepas ni, kena start ajar solat Subuh pulak. Kena hafal doa qunut pula. Doa Iftitah pun anak I tak hafal lagi. Tapi tak apa kan, slowly but surely.</div><div><br /></div><div>Mungkin ini cara Allah nak bagi pahala pada I. Anak I belajar bacaan solat dari ibunya sendiri. 😥 Oh, my heart, sebaklah pulak...Oh, Allah, please forgive us and Alhamdulillah for this opportunity.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-79650625663484774522023-01-28T23:16:00.000+08:002023-01-28T23:16:26.645+08:00I feel like I post more about my daughter on IG. But, that's okay, because now, I feel like I write more about my son on the blog.<div><br /></div><div>My son ni special. Memang selalu nampak garang, kasar, cakap pun jerit jerit. Tapi softie inside. I notice whenever I ask him to do something, no matter how he much he does not like it, he always says okay. Obedient. Unlike his sister, often playfully says no.</div><div><br /></div><div>I was unwell yesterday. On my menses, feeling yucky about myself, achy all over because of the vaccine...But I needed to do laundry. My son immediately stopped playing on his laptop, and helped me carry the laundry. Like, how sweet is that, I did not even ask. I said thank you and kissed him on the head and of course, told him that he was a good boy.</div><div><br /></div><div>I feel so blessed. Both of kids are good kids. I don't even remember being this well-behaved when I was young. I remember my mom was often annoyed by me, though.</div><div><br /></div><div>Today, I was all depressed and my son stayed by side trying to make me feel better. My daughter did too, they were both hugging me and rubbed my back. I guess because my son is slightly older, he understands me more. My children are really caring and takes care of me.</div><div><br /></div><div>I am so grateful that sometimes, I don't feel I deserve them. </div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-55940008592827351582023-01-23T22:38:00.001+08:002023-01-23T22:38:22.300+08:00I've just started to teach my son not to miss his prayers. I know, late, but he's going to be 10 this year, it's okay, we go slow and steady...So far, solat semua except for Subuh. Tak apalah, we'll try for 3-6 months, then we'll start Subuh pulak. That's the plan...<div><br /></div><div>Initially, we solat together. But, then, he began to become impatient. He's saying that I'm too slow...Tak apalah, yang penting not to miss solat. Perfection, sincerity, khusyu' dan hidayah tu kita slow...Budak kan...Berdiri tegak pun masih tak reti duduk diam.</div><div><br /></div><div>Anyway, I couldn't pray because I'm menstruating. So, I told him, I have my period, please solat without me. He knew about girls bleed from their vaginas from his teenager cousins...</div><div><br /></div><div>Today, he asked:</div><div>- Macam mana Mommy tau Mommy period?</div><div>Well, I saw blood on my undies.</div><div>- Sakit ke Mommy?</div><div>Some girls get pain, but I don't.</div><div>- Semua girls period ke hari ni?</div><div>Eh, tak lah. We get period every month on random days.</div><div>- Kenapa boys tak period?</div><div>Sebab boys don't give birth. If you get your period, it means you are not pregnant. But, if you don't get your period, it means a baby is growing in your womb.</div><div>- Oh, you are bleeding because the baby is killed? The baby died, that's why blood coming out!</div><div>Hhmm...Sorta. Now, go to sleep. Good night.</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-19972754200320076012023-01-12T23:30:00.000+08:002023-01-12T23:30:25.546+08:00I acknowledge that my son is not a Maths whiz. Which makes me a bit frustrated because I used to love Maths, and I always find it to be the easiest subject. I mean, once you know it, you know. Just throw whatever numbers, use the correct formulas, and done, instant results!<div><br /></div><div>That's why I am a little bit hard on him. I could not understand why he doesn't count as fast as when I was his age. Primary Maths are just patterns. I get pretty annoyed because he could not recognize the patterns unless I really show him.</div><div><br /></div><div>One day, his teacher told me he was falling behind. He didn't do his homework for months. I was furious. After much interrogation, I found out he stopped understanding the subject after he missed one week of school due to COVID-19 infection.</div><div><br /></div><div>I was disappointed in myself, my son, and his teacher. I mean, he goes to a private school with only 20 students in his class. Why can't his teacher make sure he understand! Ugh, so annoying.</div><div><br /></div><div>And began the episodes of me drilling him, making sure he understands all the topics. There were many episodes of crying, me losing my temper and saying inappropriate things to my son, hurting his feelings along the way. And that's why I'm upset when I had to be his teacher. I have no patience. When I'm in my teacher mode, I become a perfectionist. No mistakes are allowed. Nothing is ever good enough. Even when he gets all correct, I would still not be satisfied with his timing for answering the questions.</div><div><br /></div><div>At one point, my son thought I didn't love him and thought he was stupid. He cried and I embraced him. I apologized and told him to yell the safe word if he thinks I've gone too far. Then, I told him that Mommy wasn't mad at him, 'teacher Mommy' did. So...</div><div><br /></div><div>When I taught him, he began to understand and find Maths to be easier that he thought. I was like- Didn't your teacher teach you like this? Didn't your teacher show you like this?</div><div>He would tell me- No. Teacher ajar susah! Mommy ajar senang!</div><div><br /></div><div>Seriously...</div><div><br /></div><div>He sat for his Maths exam and today, his teacher announced the result.</div><div><br /></div><div>He was super happy that he got 72%. I was like..."Hhmm...That's a B."</div><div>"But I passed, Mommy! Only 3 boys passed!" He said so proudly.</div><div>I didn't have the heart to tell him that that's not good enough. Everybody should get an A for Primary Maths because it's gonna get harder.</div><div><br /></div><div>Anyway, I let him have his moment. I mean, he was over the moon. Like, wow, what an achievement for him, it's cute.</div><div><br /></div><div>Before bed, as usual, we talk, just the two of us.</div><div>Apparently, 9 boys failed. The lowest was 11%. He is the sixth highest in class. The highest 3 are all girls, highest being 89%, nobody got A+. All girls passed except one.</div><div><br /></div><div>The boys even created a Failed Corner- you can only enter if you failed.</div><div><br /></div><div>Seriously, what school is thissss...What is wrong with his teacher! I hope he gets a different Maths teacher when he enters Standard 4!</div><div>Hahaha...Nak tergelak pun ada. Like, oh, my dear son, I wonder how you'd feel in a public school, where you have to compete with 40 students, or 300 students in your batch.</div><div><br /></div><div>Seeing his excitement today, I am happy for him. Maybe I need to learn to lower my expectation. I just need to accept that my son is not a Maths whiz, he's a Geography whiz. His General Knowledge far exceeds mine when I was his age.</div><div><br /></div><div>I hope he knows that I'm proud of him nevertheless. Bless his innocent soul- 72% is excellent...Hahaha...In the real world, 72% is only average, who's gonna tell him...</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-13867493587757627532022-12-29T23:25:00.000+08:002022-12-29T23:25:13.679+08:00Tadi, I kemas dapur. Rumah bersepah gila. Then, I entered the kids' room, tengok my daughter's clothes box bersepah, terus rasa marah. Like, how...! Can't you see the house is so messy, lepas tu bila baju dah lipat elok-elok, ambillah elok-elok! How many times do you expect me to kemas kemas kemas dan kemas! This anger was towards my husband because he was the one who dressed my daughter this morning! And I blamed my daughter too, because I'm pretty sure she said no to many outfits until she found something that she liked.<div><br /></div><div>Daughter knew she was guilty, and she said- I'm sorry, Mommy, please forgive me. Do you forgive me?</div><div><br /></div><div>This girl memang pandai, kaki bodek, sweet talker.</div><div><br /></div><div>My son pulak, cepat-cepat hugged me really tight, while whispered- Calm down, calm down...</div><div><br /></div><div>Haihh...Manalah budak-budak ni belajar kan...I am blessed, Alhamdulillah. They are really good children, ada kekurangan masing-masing, but perfect in my eyes. I always tell them- I'm so grateful to become your mother. It's true, I really mean it.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>Anyway...</div><div><br /></div><div>Hari tu kan, I tengok Tik Tok. Sometimes, I think, I am often different than the majority. Pemikiran lain. Am I weird?</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>Example 1:</div><div>Pasal isu staff llao llao bagi extra topping. And the comments were like- I pernah kerja so-and-so, I selalu bagi lebih. Bukan duit I pun, tak apa.</div><div><br /></div><div>Another comment: Buat apa kerja extra, bukan company kita pun. Boss tak kisah pun pasal kita.</div><div><br /></div><div>Like, I find it so disturbing yang bercakap ni Melayu Islam. And ramai pulak tu yang menyokong.</div><div><br /></div><div>One- itu bukan hak you nak bagi extra extra pada customer. Tu tetap dianggap mencuri. Ke I yang salah ni? You nak pemurah sangat, you take it out from your pocket lah...Bukan ke itu namanya tak amanah?</div><div><br /></div><div>Two- Whatever happens to giving the best when you work on something? Sure lah, sometimes you tak dihargai, tak dapat duit lebih, tapi kepuasan diri dan ganjaran dari Allah kan ada...Kenalah buat sehabis baik. Ni kerja pun cincai...</div><div><br /></div><div>Seriously, generation yang menakutkan.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>Example 2:</div><div>Pasal isu ASB. Like, oohh, dapat dividen sikit. Not worth it, bla bla bla.</div><div><br /></div><div>I pulak macam- You nak duit lebih banyak macam mana lagi? You bukannya actively main saham. You letak je kot duit you dalam tu, lepas tu, you expect nak dividen banyak-banyak? Like, how, you don't even sweat and you expect free money? Sure lah, dulu dividen lagi tinggi, it's getting worse, bla bla bla. But, at the end of the day, why so many of you rasa money should come that easy? For me, kalau I dapat static amount pun, I tak kisah. Sebab, I letak je duit dalam tu.</div><div><br /></div><div>Yang marah ni, mostly orang yang ambil loan lah...Tapi, before you signed the agreement, takkan you tak tahu semua benda ni risky? Orang yang paling kaya, ialah orang yang tiada hutang.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>Example 3:</div><div>Pasal isu pergi Dubai/ other Gulf countries dan dilayan buruk. Hhmm...Itu pun nak jadi isu. Hahaha...I don't understand. Like, so? You dekat Malaysia, you Bumiputra, you rasa you lah yang terpaling first class. Bila you pergi overseas, you get bad treatments, you tak puas hati pulak. Habis tu, yang selama ni you buat dekat orang lain? Pandang serong pada orang Bangladesh, Nepal, Indonesia, Rohingya, Filipina and Africans?</div><div><br /></div><div>Funny, you rasa you have to dress better, speak better or introduce yourself as a Malaysian.</div><div><br /></div><div>Sometimes, it's just their culture. Kita rasa diorang tu rude, sebab budi bahasa orang Malaysia ni terlebih tinggi sikit. Padahal, orang tu biasa je, that's just the way they communicate, especially if English is not their first language. Tak payah lah nak sensitif sangat...</div><div><br /></div><div>I am weird because I actually enjoy when people underestimate me. Not that I rasa I want to prove something to them at the end of the day, but I like to feel how people view me if I have nothing. I am an empath, and I like to feel how other less privileged people get treated.</div><div><br /></div><div>I feel like those kinds of experiences would humble me and keep me grounded. And I think the reminders are important in my life. Embrace it.</div><div><br /></div><div>Kadang-kadang memanglah rasa marah, like, why are you so rude. Tapi tak adalah sampai, I demand you change your attitude because I am so-and-so. Kita pun setakat Malaysian je, currency pun kecik. Kalau you rasa hebat sebab you ada Dr or Ir or Dato etc, hhmm, tak payahlah...Tu cuma title je okay...</div><div><br /></div><div>Pelikkan I ni...Even at work, I don't mind kalau clients ingat I ni kerani biasa je. Tak kisah pun, bukan hina pun. Not that I am avoiding from my actual responsibility that I pretend to be clueless so that I don't have to answer difficult questions. Tapi some clients memang macam tu, when I try to explain things, they don't want to listen sebab diorang ingat I ni kerani! I really tryyyy...Ada yang taknak pun pandang I ni. So, tak apalah, I biar je lah clients tu deal dengan orang yang dia comfortable with, and eventually orang tu akan refer balik clients tu pada I. Hahaha...</div><div><br /></div><div>And no, bukan sebab kitorang buruk, sebab kerani semestinya cantik-cantik. Hahaha. Mungkin, there's something about my face, or the way I talk. Tapi mostly orang cakap sebab I act younger than I actually am, orang pun tak percaya I ni bos.</div><div><br /></div><div>Terima je lah, kita ni memang nobody. Tak jadi isu pun kalau kita dapat layanan biasa-biasa. You nak happy, it begins within yourself. Bukan happy sebab orang layan you macam anak raja. I pun geram okay kalau orang demand layanan special sebab orang tu adalah mertua kepada menantu dia punya pakcik yang kerja sebagai PA seorang VIP. Whattttt...Orang yang waris sipi sipi ni lah yang biasanya membuat onar. Setakat menumpang nama orang tu je...Hahaha...</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-21177651502329116922022-12-03T22:44:00.000+08:002022-12-03T22:44:02.752+08:00Depressed lah...I feel like my life is not right. Everything is wrong. Entahlah, balasan kot, sebab jahat sangat kot...<div><br /></div><div>At least I'm in Malaysia lah kan. Musim hujan pun dah berselimut. I can't imagine kalau winter. Dahlah electricity and gas mahal gila, tengah crisis kan...Walaupun I ni jenis tahan sejuk, I just can't. </div><div><br /></div><div>Back to my depression...I know this is serious because I've been sleeping and eating, gaining weight, neglecting housework, no interest whatsoever...Not getting any professional help yet, but I do hope I snap out of it very soon.</div><div><br /></div><div>Everyday, I tell my children that I am sad, I feel stupid...This can't be good for them to hear me, their own mother, saying all this. But, I really don't have anybody else.</div><div><br /></div><div>Very good kids, they are, sometimes when they see my expressionless face, they would offer me a cuddle.</div><div><br /></div><div>I am such a failure lah, not good in anything, I am just humiliating myself. Kenapalah I macam ni...</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-40587636493020410022022-11-23T20:34:00.005+08:002022-11-23T20:34:59.229+08:00<p>Feeling super annoyed today. Entahlah...For the past few years, I've been feeling weird. Like, I think I should be diagnosed with Autism or ADHD, I don't know...</p><p>I am always a last-minute kinda girl. I procrastinate, even with very important things- this cannot be normal. I can't focus. When I wan to concentrate on something, I have so many questions in my head that would deviate me from my goal.</p><p>Like- Okay, today I want to complete Task A</p><p>But my brain- Before that, I need to understand why we need to this task. Maybe, I should answer the past year sample questions first to save time. Is the answer A or B. I don't know, let's Google for the answer. Oh, that bag is nice. Let's see if the website offer Black Friday discount. Why am I itchy? Must be the ants! Look at that! Ants eating my crumbs. I need to buy a handheld vacuum. Let's go Shopee...Ooohh...</p><p>And before I knew it, I wasted 2 hours of my life.</p><p>Plus, the fact that my mood is so labile. Am I having a bipolar or what! </p><p>I really think I need professional help. But, what if, I turned out just normal...This can't be normal!</p>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-33250973423040367112022-10-04T01:45:00.001+08:002022-10-04T01:45:05.195+08:00<p>Tadi sebab upset, jom kita cerita santai sikit.</p><p>About 3 weeks ago, I think, ada orang message I, nak berkenalan. Hahahaha! I don't know who this person was. He was like, "Askum. Bz kew?" Seriously, how old are you!</p><p>I was opening the Whatsapp Web in my desktop. Showed the text message to my staff, and I thought he got the wrong person. Because, my staff is younger and prettier complete dengan kulit licin, putih, gebu. So, I replied- I think you got the wrong person. Tell me who are you really looking for.</p><p>This guy pun cakap- Saya cari kawan. Itu pun kalau awak sudi...</p><p>Hahaha...I malas nak layan. So, I pun berterus terang je lah- Sorry, I am not available.</p><p>My staff cakap, "Mesti orang ni ingat Miss ni kerja kerani." Yeah, I get that a lot.</p><p>Anyway, seperti biasa, mestilah excited. Dah tua-tua ni, ada peminat pulak...Dah lah pergi kerja bare face. Skincare routine is working out!</p><p>Betullah...Sebab last week, I brought my son to Kidzania. And while waiting for my son outside of the playroom, there was this one tween/ teen who thought I was lining up to play! "Kak, akak tengah beratur ke?"</p><p>Adik...If only you knew I am entering my 40s.</p><p>Must be of what I wore kot...I don't know lah.</p><p>Disebabkan last week, I balik jumpa Mother, I pun cerita je lah pasal ada orang nak berkenalan. Ye lah, nak cerita pada siapa lagi? I actually told my husband but got 'meh' reaction from him.</p><p>Then you know what Mother said to me? Basically, Mother pun tak heran because...My 65 year-old aunt, a widower, apparently dah ada 5 orang ajak dia kahwin! Hahahaha! Totally stole my thunder! </p>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-20166712751148330572022-10-04T01:06:00.001+08:002022-10-04T01:06:34.885+08:00<p>I don't know why but I am so bothered after my 6 year-old daughter told me about what happened to her 2 weeks ago.</p><p>She's in kindergarden and her closest friends are Jess and Gina (not real names). She is always thinking about them, like, can they come for a sleepover, can I buy this toy for them too, I want to make bracelets for them, Jess this, Gina that...</p><p>And I am happy for her. They seem like nice girls and that's why my daughter loves them so much.</p><p>We were on a holiday last week. Naturally, before we went, my daughter was all excited and told her friends about the plan.</p><p>Tapi I tak tau lah, diorang ni jealous ke apa, 2 days before we left, Jess told the whole class not to talk to my daughter for the whole day. And nobody was allowed to sit with her.</p><p>She told me this yesterday. And then she said, "So, I sat alone and drew a broken heart."</p><p>And that broke my heart! Geram tau, kecik-kecik dah mean girls! And, I was like, "Aw, she's just jealous of you. Why is she so mean!"</p><p>And my daughter still defended them, "They didn't talk to me for one day only, Mommy. We are friends now."</p><p>I'm so upset and bothered. Why lah do like that to my daughter. I bukanlah nak bias ke apa, but Baby H ni memang baik sangat. She's so empathatic, kind, loving, helpful, generous and polite. And tengoklah, she didn't even tell me this right away, semalam baru cerita...</p><p>Am I just being protective, or overdramatic.. I don't know. I diam je lah, tak adalah nak halang my kid from being friends with her. I just told my daughter not to be like her. Tapi deep down, sekarang ni, I tak suka si Jess ni! Mean girl vibe sangat!</p>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-76701108369671207672022-09-17T22:09:00.000+08:002022-09-17T22:09:04.781+08:00The other day, my colleagues and I were talking about who's nice and who's not. There are a few people who are suoer duper nice, that one of colleagues said: Baik gila macam bidadari!<div><br /></div><div>Whoa! Level bidadari dah ni...</div><div><br /></div><div>I, didn't want to get left behind, spontaneously said, "What about Miss Ectopy (me)? Ketua bidadari?"</div><div><br /></div><div>I think I'm pretty nice!</div><div><br /></div><div>My statementwas met with laughter, and he said- "Awak pun baik jugak...Tapi awak pun ada tegasnya. Bagus juga..."</div><div><br /></div><div>Compliment? No? I don't know. Apparently, when you are tegas, you are not bidadari level. Hahaha!</div><div><br /></div><div>Tapi I happy je...I suka je orang kata I tegas. Tegas is good lah kan? Jangan biar dipijak.</div><div><br /></div><div>Teringat pulak once upon a time when I was garang. Haha. Takdelah garang sangat pun. Just that, I had that aura. Apparently, people were scared to call me. I toned down a lot, lot, after getting pregnant because I didn't want people to curse my unborn child. Hehehe...</div><div><br /></div><div>Yea, people change, you know. I know a lot of people who were once awful. Now, they are well loved, famous taraf celebrity. Padahal dulu-dulu, perangai pun menyakitkan hati. That's why I tend not to judge the young ones. Ala, muda-muda mestilah banyak buat benda bodoh. We were once young too...Nobody's perfect.</div><div>Tapi kalau dah tua-tua pun masih perangai tak senonoh, that's shameful.</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4710820085589711129.post-56956480243730951532022-09-13T23:40:00.001+08:002022-09-13T23:40:52.573+08:00I actually wanted to pen down something in a long time, but...Entahlah, got a bit shy kot...The story macam ni...<div><br /></div><div>Adalah this one older guy, whom I got to know through work. He's a VIP. I treat him in a very professional, always.</div><div><br /></div><div>Then, he liked to call me, okay, fine. He was like- "Aww...Thank you for helping me out. We should go out, I want to treat you to makan-makan."</div><div><br /></div><div>Innocent me thought he meant he wanted to treat my team and I for lunch. And I was like- That's too bad, we are in MCO, maybe next time, bla bla bla.</div><div><br /></div><div>And he was like- We should have dinner together.</div><div><br /></div><div>Okay, so he was thinking of dinner, instead of lunch, meaning he was not inviting my team, only me. (Because where I work, nobody wants to go out to eat after office hours. We just don't do that. If we did, nobody would've come, trust me.)</div><div><br /></div><div>I stayed positive. Jangan nak perasan. I am not young. Surely he knows there's a very high chance that I am married. Besides, logically, I could not be that young because of the position I hold. So, buat tak tahu je lah.</div><div><br /></div><div>At this point, I found he is indeed single.</div><div><br /></div><div>Then, he started to message me about non-related work stuff, on weekends. Like- Hey, what are you doing for the weekends?</div><div><br /></div><div>And I had a feeling he was hitting on me, so, I said- I probably go to the beach today because MY kids want to go there.</div><div><br /></div><div>Isn't that obvious?</div><div>I mean, if I were him, I would have asked other people about my status before even trying. It's not a secret.</div><div><br /></div><div>Okay, so no contact for a few weeks, or maybe months, I can't remember. Then, he needed my help. Fine, I am professional and I thought my status is clear to him by then.</div><div><br /></div><div>And, he came to see me, and we talked, of course. But, this time, he was so direct about his intention. He told me about the time when his brother and his wife came to see me, and his brother approved of me- My brother cakap you ni baik, cantik, lembut...And as soon as dia cakap macam tu, I cakap, you jangan nak kacau Miss Ectopy tu, Miss Ectopy tu I punya...</div><div><br /></div><div>Pastu dia cakap- My brother tu pilot, dah kahwin 3 kali, 2 of his wives are stewardess. I tak nak lah stewardess. Adalah dia cuba kenen-kenen kan dekat I, I pun adalah try keluar, tapi I tak nak lah.</div><div>Basically he was telling me, he rejected them because of me.</div><div><br /></div><div>Lama jugaklah bercakap, almost one hour. Because he's a VIP, I had to practice the art of conversing. Because, if I salah cakap, tak pasal-pasal kena buang negeri lah pulak kan. In the end, I casually mentioned the word husband, and he finally got it!</div><div><br /></div><div>He also played it cool, gelak-gelak. And he asked me whether he knows my husband, and I showed him the picture, and yes, they do know each other. "Oh, dia ada cakap isteri dia dekat KL," to which I responded, yea, we were having LDR and I moved here a couple of years ago. Then, he said, you janganlah cerita pula dekat husband you.</div><div><br /></div><div>I did not. I tak bagitahu my husband langsung. It's best for now.</div><div><br /></div><div>Truthfully, I am flattered lah. Like, siapa tak suka kan ada peminat, for someone yang dah kahwin, dah ada anak, yang tak pakai mekap langsung pergi kerja, kadang-kadang pakai spec sampai tudung kembang hari-hari...</div><div><br /></div><div>Tapi, minta jauh lah...Benda-benda macam ni, I tak main lah, I'm past that. Why would I risk my marriage just for a little bit of excitement?</div><div><br /></div><div>Lastly, kenapa orang tua suka I? Sebab mata diorang rabun, sebab tu rasa I cantik. Hahaha...Sebab dia rasa, I am the best that he could have. Tak boleh lah cari orang hot sangat, sebab diri sendiri pun tak hot, you get what I mean? Hahaha...</div>the ectopyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12575375081748976551noreply@blogger.com0