Losing weight

I think I am not fat. Of course I am not fat.

In fact, I am happy with the body I have now. My boyfriend was attracted to my body shape first before he decided to approach me. So, that indicates something good eh? I told my guy friend about this and he agreed, I am not fat, I have a nice body. A bit flat on the chest. Okay, I lied, my boobies are actually very small....

But, I live with friends who are concerned about their looks.

I have a friend (Aminah) who is lighter than I am by a few kgs, same height, but she is convinced that I look thinner than she is.

She began to take pills that resulted in late menstruation because she took more than the recommended dosage. She collapsed once after working out because she starved herself. She even throws up after heavy meals.

Until a few months ago, she thought the smallest UK size is size 8. She is a size 8. After she found out that the smallest size is actually size 6, she is determined to squeeze into that dress size.

I am worried about her because her behaviour is affecting me as well. Now, I feel guilty if I am able to finish the food portion I order while she is puking everytime we go out together.

And she is not even a model nor a stewardess!

Another friend of mine (Bedah) is naturally thin. Well, she wasn't, but she seems to lose weight rapidly by itself.

Aminah adores Bedah's skinny legs and is always comparing herself with Bedah.

Aminah spends her time online surfing for websites on how to lose weight.

She makes me feel fat.

Bedah and I repeatedly tell her that she looks fine.

How small do you want to be?!

Her boyfriend even likes the fleshy type of girls. That's why everytime her boyfriend says she is pretty just the way she is, she would brush him off, "You like my body means my body is fat!"

So, the newspaper said 20% of the women population in Malaysia have 3G syndrome. Gebu, gempal, gemuk.

I am always afraid if I become fat one day. But I love food! Why can't I eat anything I like without worrying how bad the food is to my body?!

I am also afraid if I become fat after I give birth.

Risau, risau...