Thursday, December 13, 2007


I shouldn't be writing now but my hands are itchy like that.

I know someone, lets call him Malik, who was a very bright student and good-looking. He lived in Bangsar with his wealthy parents. Earning a five-figure salary every month in the 80s is impressive, don't you think? His father was smart too, graduated from one of the top universities in the world.

I don't know what happened, but his father became a womaniser, spending the company's money like mad. It affected his work performance and was fired. He never reclaimed his glory days after that.

Now, lets talk about Malik. Malik was popular in school. He had everything, good looks, music talents, brain, money. Living in the heart of KL, he was introduced to drugs at an early age. Plus with his family situation, he grew up to be angry and rebellious. Never had a proper tertiery education even. He is now very skinny, old, jobless, all thanks to the drugs.

It is sad to see a boy who used to have so many potentials in him, turn out to be running around the neighbourhood half-naked because he was high on drugs. Once, he even pointed a knife to his own mother.

A successful businessman told another businessman who told me this:
Nak berjaya, perlu ada dua benda
- jangan tinggal sembahyang
- jangan main perempuan

A woman can destroy everything you have ever worked for. Trust me. I've seen it. Some of us can be very poisonous.

I am not familiar with the drug industry in Malaysia. But from friends, I know it is easily available.

Probably because I didn't grow up in an urban area, I was very surprised when an 17 or 18-year-old girl admitted that she is a regular drug user. I thought she was too small and too innocent for drugs and she came from a very good family background. How could she be too stupid to get addicted?

I am trying to understand the minds of drug users. I know, some of them were born unfrotunate, nobody to guide them, too stressed for such young souls, that they turn to drugs for comfort. But there are also those who use drugs because they can. The second kind is the people who purposely invite troubles in their lives. I give them none of my sympathy.

Ganja or weed, to me, is the lowest class of drugs. According to my observation, people who are addicted to weed are normally temperemental. They beat their wives. They can be sweet at times, but they have terrible mood swings.

I could never imagine myself to marry a drug user. Most of the wives knew about their husbands' bad habits before tying the knots. But, we, women, always hope that they will change, because the men promised us so. When we realize it will never change, it is already too late.

I don't know how some women could overlook this fact in finding their husbands.

Haha, look who's saying.

I was involved with a person who was a regular drug user. When I met him, he said he had stopped. I welcomed him in my life.
Things weren't going so well between us, so I called it off, but he always threatened me.
He said he would be so crushed without me, only drugs could numb his sadness.

I didn't want to be responsible of him returning to his bad, old habit, so I gave in, many times. One day, I realized, I couldn't control this guy, he should be responsible for his own act, it is not my fault if he decided pollute his body with drugs, why would I take care of someone who wouldn't want to take care of himself?

I've had enough.

I think, the drug use also contributes to his regular visits to the psychiatry department for therapies.

At first, he blamed me for making him go crazy. I felt guilty for months. This guy has his own ways to abuse me mentally. He stalked me so bad, he once broke into my house to steal my bra. How did I know? He told me so!

The therapy helps him in some ways, I think, because he is no longer angry with me, but I would avoid any possible contacts with him.

Jangan buat jampi-jampi dekat coli tuh, sudah...


Bangkai said...


Did you write, "A woman can destroy everything you have ever worked for. Trust me. I've seen it. Some of us can be very poisonous."?

AMEN! :-)

the ectopy said...

because we are powerful like that :)

zeela said...

hi u :)
currently im reading ur post since 2007 and still working on to finish it up. anyway, i adore ur writing..

can't wait to know how is going on between ur parents which against u & bf in the upcoming entry 2008 maybe..

baca tak habis2 lagi ni..banyak post yg menarik :)