Friday, May 2, 2008

5 stories in one blog post.

I was tagged by Dahlia/ dazzledalie to do this:

5 perkara pertama yang terjadi dalam hidup.
(I don't think all of my firsts would be as interesting as hers because I am not funny lah okay...)

1) First man who was under my spell.

Haha, ayat macam bagus.

He bought me a anklet because all his sisters have anklets and he wanted me to be a part of his family.

We were in the car.

He asked for my foot and as he was putting it on me, he said, "This anklet is a symbol of my ego. With you, my ego is at the level of your feet".

Told this to a male friend. My friend said, although the ayat very power, but he was stupid. My friend condemned him for sacrificing his ego for a girl.

After my friend made me realize how this guy really loved me, I was very flattered lah of course. I was happy and felt special. But I am not a fan of anklets so I took it off.

My friend then planned to buy a pair of earrings for his girl. He jokingly said to me that he wanted to modify the phrase, "With you, my ego is at the level of your ears".


2) My first period.

Was when I was 14. Typical story, I felt wet at school, went back from school, saw my panties were stained brown, I thought, 'What the hell? Hmm...Is this my menstruation blood? But blood is supposed to be bloody red, not brown! Did I accidentally poop without realizing? Takkanlah I tak perasan I berak, I tak pernah terberak! Never! That cannot be it! No, this is neither faeces nor period, this must be a kind of weird vaginal discharge'.
So, I changed into a new pair of fresh panties and did my usual thing and again, brown stains on my underwears. Sah, confirm, memang ini period!

I remember feeling like this: Ala, dah period? Damn, lepas ni kena sembahyang, kalau tak, dosa kena tanggung sendiriiii... (I used to be very proud and happy that I hadn't gotten my period yet because I didn't have to feel guilty for missing a prayer. Haha. Tapi after that, masih tak sembahyang jugak. Sembahyang Maghrib je...)

Luckily I had free pads which I received at school when the sanitary pad companies decided to promote their products and teach us how to use the pads. So, yay, it was first time but I was already an expert on how to wear one, I didn't need to consult my mother!

I don't remember how I told Mother exactly, but it was very awkward. I waited for the next day (after my supplies had finished). I was fidgeting, yelah, I malu-malu, I didn't know how to drop the bomb I dah baligh, but I think Mother saw my dirty panties (manalah I tahu I kena basuh panties sendiri) and she somehow knew what I was going to say.

I remember how Mother announced it to my family though. It was the month of Ramadhan. I was menstruating, but I woke up anyway for sahur, (masa dulu I sangat patuh, dalam kelas Agama cakap, orang tak boleh puasa tetap kena menahan diri dari makan dan minum, and I was still ashamed to talk about period with my family, so I pretended to fast). But Mother was like, "Ectopy uzur!". There went my secret. The next day, I didn't bother to wake up for sahur and I ate during the day. Iman goyah.

3) First gift from a boy who fancied me.

We were seven. He was my next-door neighbour. He wrapped it in a piece of paper, all crumpled up and wrote my name on it. He dropped it into my mailbox. I used to get excited when the postman came so I can collect the letters and give them to Mother. I saw my gift. I unwrapped it and it was a yellow whistle.

I kept it until years later, Niece was born and being the brat that she was, she selongkar my room while I was away, habis my harta khazanah sudah hilang entah ke mana!

Anyway, I didn't like him back but I forced myself to like him because he was the only boy who fancied me. But he didn't say anything after that.

A few years later, his cousin used to stay over at his house during school holidays and we became close, I ended up liking his cousin instead. He was cuter than my neighbour himself. Nothing happened though.

He is still my neighbour, I see his cousin once in a blue moon when he came for a visit, but we no longer talk to each other.

4) First memory of someone kissing me.

My family members are not very expressive, especially in terms of physical affection.

Father was going on a course overseas. He was going to leave us for 6 months.

We were at the Subang International Airport, he hugged and kissed me. It felt weird because I was a kid, and as a six-year-old, I have no previous memories of Father kissing me.

I didn't cry. In fact, when my parents went to perform Hajj when I was eight, I didn't cry either. Siap takmau pergi airport sebab taknak ponteng sekolah. But I was forced to skip a day. (When I was in Standard Two, I only skipped two days: the day my parents went for Hajj and the day I dapat beguk, or was it chicken pox?)

My sister cried. In the car on the way home, I remember my aunts and uncles were talking about me, "Apasal Ectopy tak menangis? Tak menangis langsung budak ni..!"

I was tough. (Tapi sekarang tidak lagi, sikit sikit nak nangis...Boohoo...)

But I remember thinking, "Buat apa nak nangis! Dah tak sedih...Kenapa nak sedih?" (Moral of the story: Don't treat an eight-year-old like a kid kid, he/ she will think you are an idiot)

Anyway, after that earliest memory of Father kissing me (I am sure he kissed me before, I just don't remember okay, and it is getting less and less and over the years), Father kissed me again and again, only on special occasions.

5) First time naik motor. Not. Almost. Twice.

I was on a date. We met at Hartamas. I drove a car, he came with his motorbike. He knew I have always wanted a ride on a motorbike. I didn't expect him to ask me, but he said, "Ala, lupa bawa helmet lagi satu. Kalau tak, I could bring you for a short ride". Damn.

Tapi dalam hati lega, because I know his brother cabut tempat pemegang passenger (I don't know what it's called). His brother was taking advantage on the girls whom he brought for a ride, so they would hang onto his waist instead of hanging onto the steels on the sides of the passenger's seat.

Before you think I fancy Mat Rempits, sorry okay...First, he was not a Mat Rempit, second, during that time, Hartamas was free from Mat Rempit so if he was one, macam mana boleh sesat pulak dekat Hartamas, third, Mat Rempit tak pakai motor mahal, fourth, Mat Rempit tak cute. Hehe.

The second time I almost rode a motorcycle was when I was with my boyfriend. My boyfriend has a motorcycle license but he doesn't have a motorcycle, so, he was supposed to borrow/ rent a motorcycle so he could take me for a ride. (Cita-cita I kan nak naik motor...)

But, we both forgot about it and we had to leave his hometown on that day...So...Sampai hari ni, cita-cita nak naik motor masih belum tercapai. Maybe next time, when I visit my boyfriend's hometown. I'll make sure not to forget.

Actually, I have a few photos of myself naik motor dalam bakul when I was a toddler (with Father. He used to have one). No memory of it. That's why I kena naik jugak motor before I mati!

I need to tag others. Five if I am not mistaken.

Okay, I tag penyangak, Hjh Esah Jolie, Diana sexy, miss sha, irondanwine (if any of them reads my blog).


Anonymous said...

8 yo
The first boy who had a crush on me - he gave me a love ceramic.

9 yo
Another boy gave me a ring. Said from some other boy. I threw it in the field.

10 yo
Teacher asked who is the prettiest in class. The most handsome boy in class voted (loudly) for me.

11 yo
The most handsome guy in school, played Prince Charming - he definitely doesn't look malay. Arab caucasian thing going. Ohh, never met another guy who look like that in school. Stumbled at the corridor. Locked eyes, he was surprised & happy.

12 yo
Many boys start to enter life - AS FRIENDS. I can't quite recall everything that's going. Still wondering of Prince Charming? Ha ha ha.

13 yo
Many boys funnily for some reason love me. A bunch, followed me home. Played this love message thing on me - in class, in front of the teacher!

Most memorable the senior who I asked something, he said it's hard to get. I said never mind, no biggie. He said he would.

Most scary - the naughtiest boy in class (he was supposed to be in the weak class, but bcoz of his overt disciplinary problem he's removed to the smart class :R) followed me in class. That senior actually also jumped a flight of stairs, scares me a bit his aggressive drive. But he has his gentle ways like asking why am I quiet.

14 yo
A guy starts to like me, for the whole school years, early parts of uni! Another likes me too, he's gangstery yet cute. I like to think of him like Anakin Skywalker.

15 yo
Anakin Skywalker is braver than ever now. Said overt gushing things right in assembly, in front of people & teachers!!!

16 yo
Anakin Skywalker sent his frind, I nicknamed him Kit Kat (he rides a virago to school but for some reason I don't know his name :R) - to tell me he loves me. All his friends are there. UGH! It's so not the way to tell a girl you love her guys! One girl, many guys there - scares me!!! I'm a nice girl. He's Anakin Skywalker. I feel like Padme Amidala, even now reminiscing. I never accepted him. I don't know if he is sad or anything...

17 yo
Anakin seems so popular now. Cute & that attitude - of course ma! I just want to get over SPM.

18 yo
Pida said many guys have a crush on me. Huh? They do?

19 yo
This is not romantic, but went out with my Professor. He's so nice & funny. At one int seminar, he said his foreign friend thinks I'm pretty, he'll punch him if anything happen. Ha ha. Typical funny computer engineers.

Love, care & compassion during my fragilities after an emergency surgery. At this point, I know who my true soulmate is, what he real values in life - alhamdulillah so much.

Sergey Brin. He loves Anne Wojcicki, funded her genetic startup. Lesson: I don't have to be as pretty as you, Ectopy, to be loved by a splendid amazing guy! I don't even know why all those guys love me coz I had serious acne in school.

Modern love can never explain this.

PS: Also, I never back rub a non muhrim. I think it's haram. I never dated as well, in fact I ran away when things get overt. Alhamdulillah, he also never talk like all your admirers - very clean like Prophet Joseph.

I don't have to backrub, talk with a supposed "ayat lelaki gatal" & stuffs & true love can still happen. God Wills.

Like Ali & Fatima. Muhammad & Khadija. That's how love should be.

Anonymous said...

I also missed out a lot of stuffs - going out in fancy cars (not really important, a bicycle is lovely enough if I love him), complete strangers singing to me in malls.

I never had a crush on my friends's dad. But I did go out, not romantically, with an uncle. Same fancy car. But he's like a father, all his children are boys (like Dr Sheikh's dad!). Maybe he wants a daughter. I couldn't have a crush on an older man.

I admit, I do prefer young, handsome men. Mostly with gentle arabic features. In Saudi, Palestine there's so many of them. In Malaysia, the malay men wants Siti Nurhaliza beauties? So it's fair enough?

I'm just grateful, alhamdulillah. But I'm also scared coz so many nikmat from Allah - easy to forget that all this is a test. Nurin Jazlin never had what I have, but I believe she's happiest in the most blessed place.

How come an innocent her is so tested. So what about me. Will I be there too, with all these nikmat? Scary to think. Happy here, zero there in the hereafter - like Pharaoh. Must add more gratefulness. Never boast. All these is a mirage.

I intend to be like Ali & Fatima.

the ectopy said...

Good for you :) You have a good life and I envy that. Yes, I agree, what I did is haram. Thank you for your advice. Please pray for me too.