Wednesday, December 30, 2015

Setan ni banyak.

My husband was away for a few days, well, not that it's something new to me, but this time is different because he was uncontactable. (Ah, but he was uncontactable for a few days last year too, but that was due to flood. Too many buts!!!)

Anyway...While he was away, I kept thinking of the worst- him breaking my heart. Is he getting married again? Is he on a honeymoon or something? Is he really in Singapore?

My husband ni kan bukannya tech savvy. So, he turned off his phone. He only uses his Wi-fi if I connect it for him. Otherwise, he wouldn't know how, and is too scared to switch anything on to avoid overcharging.

That's why he was so quiet, but I couldn't help but think about all this unpleasant things. I mean, if it can happen to someone else, it can happen to me too! Plus, I've been getting numerous whispers over the years: Do you really trust your husband? Why are there hairclips in the car? Tak takut ke tinggal asing-asing?

Biasanya I buat pekak telinga je, as a sign of respect for their concerns. I don't want to unnecessarily fight without proof. I am not that kind of woman.

I mean, why should I be insecured? I am okay looking, I am smart and independent, I have my own good qualities many people are looking for, if that's not enough for my husband, then it is his loss. I have always stood by his side, helped and supported him. He is the one who should be thankful to have me!

Husband I tu pun, bukannya handsome sangat pun...Kadang-kadang, I found Whatsapp messages in his phone which I don't like. So, I deleted their numbers and blocked them, haha. My husband is so blur, he doesn't even know what I did or how to unblock them. Most of the messages are quite harmless, but I just don't like lah okay!

So, tuh lah. Tak baik kan bersangka buruk pada suami sendiri. Tapi I memang sedikit paranoid, akibat baca banyak tabloid, haha.

After 3 days of silence, he called me from the airport and I demanded him to take pictures of his luggage and airplane ticket. Crazy woman.

I tak suka ada suspicion macam ni sebenarnya. But, as they always say, never trust men 100%.

But, yeah, I write this post just to remind myself that I'm awesome. If he breaks my heart, then it is his loss, and I know he wouldn't be able to find a woman as perfect as I am --> must think like this every time setan datang to mess with head.

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It's funny to think that when I was with my ex boyfriend, I used to imagine, if I marry him, I wouldn't mind if he wants to have a polygamy. But with my current husband, lain pulak jadinya, no way I would agree to such things, okay! I guess, I never really loved my ex boyfriend, but he did give me a major heartache when we got separated for good. Tak berapa cinta pun nak patah hati macam gila. Bongok betul. Tapi ex boyfriend I tu lagi bongok, haha, thank God I didn't marry him.

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