I received a text from a dear friend.
She's not somebody that I regularly talk to. We used to work together until I left my previous workplace.
Anyway, out of the blue, she said she was pregnant, and she lost the baby at 14 weeks of pregnancy. That was 2 weeks ago, and currently she is resting at her mother's house and is forced to eat healthy food.
We got married within a few weeks apart, so she probably felt that she needed to tell me about it.
This is her 3rd unsuccessful pregnancy.
It got me thinking.
Although, as much as I want to get pregnant, it probably worse for me if I lost my baby, three times consecutively!
Before I replied my friend text, I thought hard about what I wanted to say. At least she knew she could get pregnant (unlike me), but of course, I didn't say that.
Finally, I told her that I am lost for words (for real) and I wish I could be there to hug her instead.
A few days after that, I dreamed about my late Father.
I woke up, feeling unlucky. I must be extremely unlucky if I was not being able to conceive and raise children of my own. As you know, your children are supposed to pray for you after your death. But who are going to pray for me after I die?
Don't worry, I am all okay now. It was just something that went through my mind.
I can't get pregnant now anyway. In a few months, I'll be on a vacation which is not suitable for pregnant ladies! A lot of rigorous activities involved. All booked and confirmed!
Besides, I am not unlucky. I have a great husband.
Just this morning, we woke up, and my husband said, "You ni cantiklah...Orang cakap, kalau nak tengok perempuan tu cantik ke tak, kena tengok masa pagi masa dia baru bangun tidur. You ni, pagi-pagi bangun tidur pun cantik. Cantiknye..."
Awesome kan! That was the first time he said something like that to me.
Actually, a call to my mobile phone woke us up. I was required to do an emergency standby at work, which is quite irritating. Hari-hari pun kena pergi kerja. Benci tau. Finally, it was sorted out.
Anyway, some of the funny things over the last few weeks...
- My boss walked out on us. Like, suddenly, she got up and mumbled something and she left the room. The meeting had to be cancelled because she was in a very foul mood.
Colleague: Kenapa dia bad mood tiba-tiba ni?
Me: Entah. Nak menopause kot...
Colleague: Eh, bukan dah menopause lama dah ke...?
- My client did something extremely foolish because his fiance threatened to leave him for her ex-boyfriend.
Me: Cantik sangat ke tunang dia tu, sampai jadi bodoh begitu sekali?
Colleague: Eleh...Lebih kurang muka macam dia je...
Suffice to say, my client is not a handsome man. Haha!
Me: Hey, kalau tak cantik, kenapa banyak pulak lelaki nak? Tak ada orang nak dekat I pun...
Colleague: Orang macam kita ni terlalu cantik. Sampai lelaki pun takut nak approach. Ye lah, sebab cantik sangat...Betul tak?
Ayat nak sedapkan hati...Haha!
- We were watching TV, saw an advertisement on Acuvue Contact Lenses. The girl involved in the ad is someone who likes to take photos. The message was, she needed a good pair of contact lenses so she can focus more on her photography. Her name is Wan Lee.
Someone: Eh, dia ni orang Kelantan ke apa?
Me: Apahal pulak?
Someone: Tu, nama dia Wan Lee tu. Keturunan mana dia ni...
Me: Itu nama orang Cina lah!
Some people can be so naive kan...*Shakes head*
- As you know, I had an ongoing project which I ended up doing all by myself. The project is for a competition, which if we won, we would be going national/ international...A lot of work lah, I don't wish to win! I just nak participate je, boleh? Itu pun sebab terpaksa...
During the pre-convention, my project received a few compliments. One of the panels said I was convincing.
Because I did not plan to win, during the convention day itself,
I purposely presented in a monotone voice
I avoided all contacts and pretended to have low-self esteem
My slides were very plain and just adequate as per required. Nothing extra at all.
Purposely put a mistake in the conclusion. Haha.
Eh, but one of the judges still thought it's a good presentation.
As I am writing this, there are are other groups who are presenting. (I was group number 4) Good luck to them. I hope they win.
I seriously do not want to win. Please God!
Okay, this is the first time ever in my life that I wish not to win something and buat keja ala kadar for something so big and serious.
They will announce the winner in the afternoon!
10 hours ago