Monday, January 30, 2012

My husband told me about the story of a woman whose total asset is worth 300million. I forgot to ask 300million in which currency, though. RM or USD? Whatever currency it is, it is a lot of money.

Unfortunately, she passed away at the age of 50 plus due to cancer.

She has no children and all her relatives refuse the assets, saying that they have received enough when she was still alive. Bless them.

Now, if there is noone to claim what is left, all of the money will go to Baitul Mal.

Before she passed away, she returned to Malaysia more frequently than usual. After further investigations, she had actually built about four mosques.

Me: Apa perasaan jadi orang kaya, Abang? What would you do with the money?
Husband: I'd be like her. I akan buat masjid, derma banyak-banyak dekat orang...
Me: Boringlah you ni!
Husband: Apa pasal pulak?
Me: Kalau I, I nak swimming dalam duit tu. Sambil jerit, "Aku kaya!" Lepas tu, I nak beli macam-macam! (Laughs)

But seriously, what would you do with that amount of money?

I would buy/ build my dream house, that's for sure. Then, I'd buy a nice car. That's about it.

Last night, before I fell asleep, I wonder whether she was happy. She worked abroad, her husband passed away earlier, she had no children, but she had the money. Do I really want to be in her shoes, just to taste how it is like to have 300 millions?

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I usually sing in the car. Surprisingly, I know most song chorus well, that I can sing along to. My niece still beats me in memorizing the lyrics though. I pun tak tahu macam mana budak tu boleh ingat.

If I wasn't singing, I'd talk in the car. Talk, talk, talk.

If I wasn't singing or talking, I'd be sleeping or on a strike mode. Haha.

Usually, this is how it goes:

Me: Abang, ceritalah! Asyik I je yang cerita!
Husband: Nak cerita apa?
Me: Ceritalah apa-apa! You ni boringlah. I dah cerita macam-macam dah dekat you. Penat dah I. You lah pulak cerita!
Husband: Okay...Hari tu...Bla bla bla (boring stuff, no gossip at all)
Me: Boringlah cerita you! Dahlah, tak payah cerita lagi! (Merajuk)

5minutes later...I start to sing just to entertain myself.

Anyway, last week, we were in the car. I had no story, my husband lagilah confirm memang tak ada story...Entah macam mana, I teringat-ingat the time I used to travel with my friends.

I did a lot of travelling back then. Since being anywhere, with your favourite people, is the best thing in life, we did have super much fun! Whetever mishaps we encountered (eg: stranded at the airport because there was a bad storm), we'd turn it into something memorable.

Usually, we would play a lot of riddles and tell jokes.

Suddenly, I chuckled because I was reminded of an old joke.

Husband: Kenapa?
Me: Abang, Abang pernah tak dengar cerita pertandingan tetek.
Husband: Haha. I tahu...Tapi dah lupa sikit-sikit. You cerita baliklah.
Me: Okay. Cerita dia macam ni. (Siap buat mimik gaya pertandingan cerita penuh keseriusan, guna slang Bahasa Indonesia)

Dalam sebuah kampung, diadakan satu pertandingan buah dada terbesar.
Maka, ramailah perempuan-perempuan yang berbuah dada cantik berebut-rebut mempamerkan diri di atas pentas.
Setelah keputusan dibuat oleh para hakim, tibalah masa untuk mengumumkan pemenang buah dada terbesar. Lalu, si pengacara pun berkata,

"Tempat ketiga, jatuh kepada, Dara Suriati! Buah dadanya bersaiz buah honeydew!"

*Clap clap clap*

"Tempat kedua, dengan kebesaran buah dada bersaiz buah tembikai, jatuh kepada, Haritasari!"

*Huiyo, besarnya, clap clap clap!*

"Tempat pertama...Dengan bersaizkan buah oren...."

*Eh, apa ni! Keciknya tetek dia! Boo...Boo...*

"Sabar tuan-tuan...Sabar! Itu baru PUTINGNYA!!!"

Husband: (Laughs as if it was his first time hearing the joke)

Sekarang ni, bolehlah cerita macam ni, because it's just the two of us. Nanti, bila dah ada anak, takkan nak cerita macam ni lagi. Bad parenting pulak dah...Haha...

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In a shopping mall.

I was hungry, we were passing McDonald's.

Me: Oooh...Laparnya...I nak makan berger-mbira!
Husband: Makan apa?
Me: Berger-mbira!
Husband: Apa?
Me: Burger lah! Itu pun tak tahu...Berger-mbira tu burger! Ber-ger-m-bi-ra!
Husband: (Laughs) Apalah bini abang ni...Macam budak-budak!
Me: You tak pernah dengar ke? It can be bergegar, bergelora...Any 'berge'...

Actually, semua benda-benda bodoh macam ni, I dapat masa I travel with my friends lah...

Like,

Q: Dalam banyak-banyak pen, pen apa masuk air keluar buih?
A: Pantene!
The above is actually from my niece. Haha.
Told this to my friends but they rejected it because, "Kena kocak-kocak dulu baru keluar buih!"

Q: Apa beza kereta baru dengan isteri baru?
A: Kereta baru, bila nampak lubang, kena mengelak. Isteri baru, bila nampak lubang, suka!

Q: Buka baju, ada bulu. Selak bulu, ada batang. Apakah dia?
A: Jagung.
Everytime I nampak batang jagung, mesti teringat teka-teki ni.

And many more! Some are even mind-boggling smart kind of riddles!

6 comments:

Moose said...

reading this post reminded me of some good memories i had masa travelling jugak. we used to play hangman, & this 1 game yg i tktau nama apa but goes like this,

someone pick 1 alphabet, lps tu kena list down countries,fruit,artist yg start with the alphabet.

we had so much fun!

the ectopy said...

omg, i pun main game nama negara/ fruits tu okay!(kalau nak susah lagi kena name body parts/ brand names) the simplest game of all. tapi gila excited sebab taknak kalah punya pasal!

MarlissaMusa said...

haiyooo, sebijik macam i ngan my husband..suka cakap merepek-repek..dia pon pelik..mana i dapat semua cerita merepek...and yes, i got all those funny2 stories masa merepek dengan kawan la zaman dolu2! ahahah

Lollies said...

I remembered narrating the tetek joke when i was in form 4. good old days. and joke mushroom lah. semuanya tak senonoh. LOL

Buah apa bijinya di luar?

Mak Piah said...

Ectopy : U r blessed. :-)

eimma's said...

ok nak gelak je