Kesian my husband. I think I can be difficult to live with.

My mood is labile. I can be shouting, crying and laughing within minutes. I am so blessed that I have a husband who is very patient and able to tolerate my nonsense.

I also can be insensitive and sometimes, too frank regarding my opinions.

Living with someone who is of a different social background than you is challenging.

Sometimes, my husband says I am spoilt.

The thing is, I expect my husband to give me what Father used to provide me with. Actually, better things than Father, because that's how I was raised to believe in. Life must be constantly improved. For me, that's success.

I have learned to mind my words and my husband has learned to not mind so much the things I don't mean to say.

I can't remember the last time we went to bed angry. I am glad that he now knows that a kiss and an apology (even though he's not wrong) are the things I really want whenever we are in an argument. Haha. Perempuan lemah. Senang betul kena pujuk.

However, I still couldn't help but to refuse from riding a Kancil or a motorcycle.

Fine, I don't mind so much the motorcycle because the helmet covers my face. But the fact that I am getting used to it, the fact that I am no longer scared of the 'kona baring', the fact I can now not hold onto my husband as a pilllion rider, it changes me. I am now a minah rempit/ bohsia. Haha.

As for the Kancil/ Viva, that's because of health issue. I am simply allergic to the car. Whenever I am in it, I'd feel nauseated. It might be the poor suspensions which cause vibrations to my brain that my body could not take. It's real. I do not make up the symptoms. So, in order to avoid me from having throbbing, painful headaches, no small cars for me, please! Not even a five-minute ride.

It's good to have somebody who is 'sekufu' as your partner.

I have to tolerate people who do not use the same plate and saucer set to serve their guests (how can you jumble everything and put them on display for your guests!), I have to give up wearing high heels to weddings (I'd end up ruining my shoes or simply terpeleot di tengah jalan), always eat the same type of food for lunch/ dinner because nobody knows how to cook/ eat proper Western/ Japanese/ Chinese food (must eat nasi pagi petang siang malam baru boleh kenyang) but I swear I'll learn to satisfy myself in this matter, etc etc.

My marriage requires a hell lot of gives and takes.

Even though, physically, my life is at a plateau or probably, worse (?) but spiritually, this is still considered a progress.

Ah, this reminds me of a conversation my husband, my friend, *Hassan, his brother, *Hassanudin and I were having. (Haha. Hassan and Hassanudin? Pandai-pandai je I ni buat nama)

We were talking about Japan and tsunami. How animals are reliable signs for a natural disaster to occur.

Husband: Sebelum tsunami jadi, banyak ikan dekat tepi pantai. Orang pun suka. "Rezeki Tuhan ni. Murahnya rezeki!" Padahal dia orang tak tahu, ikan sebenarnya lari dari ombak besar.

Hassanudin: Hahahaha. Kalau rezeki datang dulu, baru datangnya kesusahan, itu namanya bala! Kalau kesusahan datang dulu, lepas tu baru rezeki datang, tu baru namanya ujian Tuhan...

So, to conclude, be patient of your harships. InsyaAllah, kesenangan akan menyusul.

Chewaahh, ending baik punya! Haha.