My son loves his school but we will change school starting next year.
It breaks my heart, because I really want to be loyal and supportive to his old kindy, but I guess, it is no longer convenient for us.

I remember when looking for a school, I was specific about wanting it to be Montessori, colourful, cheerful...And I found it. It is a small and new school, with minimal number of students.

I know the teachers, who are the owners, are doing it because they are passionate about it. They are not doing it for the money...Come on, RM300 per month for 7-10 students, that's like barely RM1500 per month (they only have 2 teachers). I don't think they are making any profits yet, and I really, really wish they would because they are such good people, but I just can't continue there.

Mother says it's too far away, we need a bus, I no longer have a maid, my son wants to learn Chinese...

The new school, it's a little crowded, and I don't like the toilet. There's Mandarin subject, so I don't have to pay RM60 per hour to a tutor (yes, I looked around for a tutor). I'm not planning to enrol him to a Chinese school (my only criteria is- a school that is close to my house), but because he keeps asking me for Mandarin class, so here we are, at a new school...

I'm getting too emotionally attached to his old school that it feels like I'm going through a tough break-up.
Tsk. Itu pun nak nangis...

Friday night.

I dreamt that I went to London with one of my bosses. We had a walk on Oxford Street (looked more like the street in the town I used to study), met up with my friends and went to a Japanese restaurant I used to frequent 10 years ago.

They thought my boss and I looked cute together and we had to explain that we are with different people, I have 2 kids back home.

Somehow, I am always relieved when I remember this information even when I'm dreaming. It's like- kids, Mommy never forgets you!

After that, my boss and I continued walking. Suddenly, I remembered we were supposed to catch a train to go to Japan (Paris made more sense, actually). So, we were rushing to the train station.

I was thinking- how could I forget this! I forgot, I forgot!

Saturday night.

I was in Palestine with a group of people. We were on a tour. There were safe zones and dangerous zones. We need to go through dangerous zones to get to the safe zones.

We were warned to stay as discrete as possible in dangerous zones. When were in dangerous zones, we had to walk fast and keep our heads down. But, somebody bumped into me and I blew my cover. I was chased. I had to run and crawl through small and dark alleys to get to the safe zone.

We had our meals and watched a documentary about Palestine. But that fella kept watching from outside, just waiting for the moment to catch me.

To return to the airport, again, we had to briefly pass the dangerous zone. Since I was already targeted, putting the entire group at risk, we had to be really quick.

But I got left behind. Every body was saving their own life. There was a group of Taiwanese flight attendants. They helped to cover me.

At the airport, the flight attendants used the express lane. I sneaked in with them, but got caught. They asked for money. They thought I didn't have cash, wanted to use my credit card, and my card didn't go through. They said I had to stay behind and get on the next flight.

Suddenly, they said it would be best for me because the Israelis would be waiting for at the aeroplane and that could jeopardise my whole family.

- I didn't remember any of my family coming with me on that trip

- how did they know someone is chasing after me

- is it just an excuse for me to miss my flight, or do they genuinely wanted to help me?

Suddenly, I remembered Mother said- whatever you do, get on that plane.

I increasingly became skeptical and followed my instinct to leave the room at the very last minute to be on that aeroplane.

I woke up before I knew whether I made it or not.

Wow, so intense.

Sunday night.

I did recall the dream this morning but I couldn't remember while writing this.

All I know is- it was also about rushing to catch a flight. I was in India this time.

For the past few days, I've been feeling tired despite having adequate hours of sleep.

After I woke up this morning, I googled on what it means...I've had the same dream 3 nights in a row- rushing. Always rushing.

Rushing to catch a train/ flight.

Rushing to go to a destination.

Afraid of missing a transportion.

And it makes me sad...If the interpretation was true, it makes me sad that I am at this point of my life. Hhmmm...