Currently, there's a new hunk in the department and I'm way too attracted to him!
It wasn't love at first sight. We spent one day together (work-related) and I'm beginning to see the charisma in him.
I shared the news with my other colleagues and that was the first time my colleagues got to evaluate my taste in man.
"Ectopy, he's ugly!" my friend told me.
I know he's not good looking, but he's not thaaat bad looking! I even explained to my friends that they have to spend one day with him to discover the sweetness in him.
Only those who have THE eyes can see it, only those who have THE sense can feel it.
However, he's married. With a kid some more.
I accidentally found out more about his background, and I could see the similarities between him and my boyfriend.
No wonder I'm so attracted to him!
The thing is, I just couldn't help myself from being attracted to him! Argh! It's been long since I last had a huge crush on a guy like this. I hope it'll die off soon because
he is married!
Now I know how it is like to be attracted to a married man.
If his wife ever finds out that her husband has an admirer, I hope she will take it as a compliment instead of a threat.
Today, at work, my colleague told me, "Ectopy, you always have a different view."
Another colleague said, "Ectopy, I never see you get panicked."
You see, we had a huge thing going on this morning and everyone whose involved was sweating and worrying.
I did worry and I did get panicked, I felt my heart was pounding, but somehow the emotions didn't reflect physically by my facial expression.
Besides, what else could I do? Cry? Smile sajalah...
Smile and eat quietly. And looking at things positively. That's when the comment of- me having a different view- given.
Oh-kay. I didn't realize that my view was quite different from the general population.
Perhaps that's why I wasn't very impressed by the book Tuesdays With Morrie. I don't consider it as an eye-opener. I've always had an optimistic outlook towards life like Morrie.
This attitude has probably been strengthened since I met my boyfriend.
Look, the way we see it, if we lost something valuable or something precious have been taken away, it's okay. They are just things. We could replace them.
It doesn't mean that we don't appreciate them, it's just that, replacing an object is a small matter and it shouldn't cause unnecessary distress in our life.
For example, somebody hit the car. It's alright. The person was stupid, of course, (for hitting my car), but it was an accident, he/she never intended it to happen and I'm probably at fault too, although very minimal.
Yang penting, we can always repair the car. Or buy a new one. And yes, mana nak cari duit. But guess what, we can always find money. Rezeki kan berada di mana-mana. So no way I'm gonna waste my time and energy regretting for what had happened and spending money on something that should've been avoided.
It's just money lah. Tak payah nak berkira sangat. Tak payah nak rasa rugi. In fact, in Islam, we are encouraged to spend our wealth (ke jalan kebenaranlah in this context). That's why, we have zakat and zuhud.
We shouldn't think too much about money and materials. It makes us greedy, it makes us stingy, it makes us arrogant.
Shit. Suddenly teringat balik dekat my crush, which from now on, I'd call Hunk. Haha.
Hunk is going to be temporary. I know myself. It will die off sooner or later.
In the meanwhile, should I continue admiring Hunk, or should I do something to make myself unlike him? Should I enjoy this harmless excitement at the workplace?
I think I know the answer.
I plan to proceed.
1 day ago